


I'm only a man

by alan713ch



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Depression, Established Pack, Fluff, M/M, based on a GIF floating in tumblr, in one fic, main character has a hard time adjusting, mention of suicide, scott mccall is a true alpha, wanted to give my own spin to the story
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-23
Updated: 2014-08-28
Packaged: 2018-01-13 13:15:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 22,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1227751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alan713ch/pseuds/alan713ch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Noah Argent thought he knew everything he needed to know in order to be an ordinary seventeen year old, even if that was not exactly true being part of a family of hunters. But when he fails to do the most critical thing he had trained for he has to rebuild his life, maybe with the help of someone else.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I think everybody has seen [this](http://betalaheyed.tumblr.com/post/72730234220) GIF set around on tumblr. I wanted to give my spin on the story as well as using it as a creative writing exercise. Hope you like it!
> 
> Rating may change if I dare to wade into smut, but so far it doesn't seem to be there.

He was seventeen. 

He was supposed to start senior year, right? He had the grades, and they were good grades - a bit sloppy in English, but he was acing Math, and his family always talked to him in French so the second language was always a doozy. He asked his father to take a third language, but since that would've been an extra homework that he'd had to do he'd always say no. 

Really? He was fucking dying and he was thinking about homework? Typical him. He could hear Michael laughing at him. 

The problem was that Michael was just a couple of feet away, his blood diluting with the rain falling through the woods. Next to his father's body. To his mom's - who decided that this was going to be a good hunt, and that they needed to spend more time bonding. Just because they had had a fight about what schools he was going to apply to.

He was a good shot, right? He knew how to use a rifle, and seven different kinds of guns, and he always aced whenever they went to the shooting range. He was also good with a knife - and that's what had saved his life, right? That he had managed to get it out of his back holster and plunged it inside the monster's torso, stopping it from devouring him completely and just leaving him with a severe case of rabies. 

He wanted to laugh at his own joke, but the gun inside his mouth prevented that. 

He thought he would see his whole life flash before his eyes the moment he'd die, but there hadn't been that much fanfare. Maybe it was that he hadn't lived that long? He was barely seventeen, and there hadn't been that many accomplishments in his life. Yeah, there was the spelling bee in seventh grade, and the gymnastics competition where he got a silver medal in tenth grade - oh! Learning how to shoot with his father since he was nine, and mom making casseroles in the kitchen while she explained the lore and the legends that surrounded the family. Fighting with his brother about nonsensical things like who would get the top bed or why was his sleeping bag full of glitter. He even remembered some of the family visits, including Scary Aunt Victoria and even Scarier Aunt Kate. At least Allie had been nice, but that had been four? Six years ago?

His hands were getting numb because of the rain and because of how tight he was gripping his mamba. It had been a present from his father, for turning seventeen. He had asked him if he wanted to take a gap year and explore the world, maybe go to France and see the old family heirlooms. As tempting as it was the idea of a year without school and an all paid vacation to Europe, he knew it was mostly to get him to do some training in the family business while in Normandy. 

Now he wouldn't live past the night. Not if he adhered to the family traditions. 

He always understood why, even if it wasn't something amenable. They all trained pretty well, so one of _them_ knowing their strategies would be disastrous for when they had to hunt them, even if they never hunted anyone themselves. Also, the amount of self loathing, the idea of being one of those creatures was supposed to be repulsive, to destroy you from the inside until only the animal was left and he could not bear to do that, right? To become an animal, a creature that would eat in the night without caring if it was man, woman or child? To be a monster only those who dared to question the shadows would know about, and most will remain blissfully ignorant about?

For a second he wished his last name was not Argent, and that he didn't have to kill himself because he had bitten by a werewolf. 

Worse: by an _alpha_.

He could feel it already, inside of him, the low growl of the wolf that was now part of himself. A slow itch beneath his skin, like fur trying to - wait, was he gonna shift? It wasn't even the full moon yet! That's why they never hunt during the full moon - in case someone would get bitten by the alpha, they'd be able to say good bye to them and let them go properly. With a burial and everything. He wasn't going to get one until another branch of the Argent family noticed their absence - would it be Allie, since she was the closest? She was still in California, right? It was a good drive up to Oregon, but at least they wouldn't have to fly in. They had called her, yes, his mom had said something about her trying to change the hunting code and discussing college applications but he hadn't paid attention that day - the hotel where they were staying had HBO On Demand and he needed to catch up with Game of Thrones. 

At least they wouldn't rot for too long. 24 hours without reporting when in an active hunt was an immediate cause of search. 

Yes, they were hunting. This particular pack had been vicious, and national news about the string of animal attacks in Deschutes County had attracted the attention of too many. They needed to wipe it out completely - they didn't feel guilty about it, since every single iris had shone blue, except for the red that went straight for him, like he had been sporting a particularly delicious scent. 

They had all died. The beast in him was alone - an omega, bound to die anyways. Better to get on with it. 

But his eyes were not going to shine blue, were they? They were supposed to shine gold, like whenever they used flash for the family portraits on his brown eyes. He had never felt guilty of anything in particular, and he had only hunted those who had hunted before him. Who had hunted humanity. 

The droplets in his face were not only from the rain - he knew that. He was afraid because he didn't want to die - he wanted to live! He was seventeen, God Damn It! He was supposed to get drunk and fail classes and go to Europe in a gap year to find out about the old continent and come back and go to college and become a businessman or a mathematician or maybe both! He was supposed to kiss girls and boys and find love and get married and have children who he would never teach how to shoot because he never wanted them to walk into the woods looking for the things that go bump in the night! He was supposed to live! 

Not to kill himself. 

Not to die. 

The wolfsbane in the magazine was stenching his nose. He knew the shot had to be clear - he had positioned the gun such that the bullet would go straight through his brain, killing him instantly. Maybe a pinch of pain, but not too much. The healing wouldn't be able to kick in, and the wolfsbane would ensure the work. 

But he was seventeen! He wanted to live!

He wanted to keep going.

He knew he couldn't do it. He could already hear his father's disappointment, his mom's tears, and Michael's japes about how much of a coward he was. 

It didn't matter. 

He needed to... 

Live. 

Run.

Eat.

Survive.

Howl.

The werewolf dropped the gun and roared at the night, scaring away anything that may get into his warpath. Without looking back he left the bodies of those who had been his old pack and those who had attacked him. 

They were dead after all, and he was alive. 

It was all that mattered.


	2. Chapter I

There was an itch in Scott's back and he couldn't get rid of it. 

No, it was not on his back. It was on his _senses_. Like when you know there is something wrong - not bad, just wrong - and you need to fix it right away. Like when you wonder if you left the iron on and need to go back running just to check. 

He got off his bed and proceeded to do his morning workout routine. Six sun salutations (Lydia insisted that they all do yoga), and then fifty pushups, fifty pistols (on each leg) and fifty one armed pull ups (on each arm). Now that he had bought himself an iPad he would read on it instead of books - the Kindle app was amazing and he had connected it to Beacon Hills public library so he could download free ebooks. 

He still was not comfortable. He thought of going for a run but he was already late for school - and he needed to knock on Stiles door before his mom woke up or the Sheriff got back home. It would be nice to receive him with a cup of coffee - and he needed Stiles to get it done, because he still couldn't get it right. Besides, Stiles would kill him if he let him oversleep. Isaac was probably up already, either reading the newspaper (the sheriff would insist in getting the print version) or cooking eggs for mom. 

"Come on Stiles, wake up!"

He heard his best friend - stepbrother now - mumble through the door and proceeded onwards. A quick sniff told him that Isaac was not in his room but had left not too long ago, and a quick check of heartbeats told him that his mom was still asleep. Downstairs he found his other stepbrother - finally adopted when his mom and the Sheriff married - next to the stove so he just put his backpack in one of the couches and helped him. Before long Stiles was downstairs rambling and the Sheriff was sitting with a cup of coffee (still the mug he had gotten him so many years ago, the "#1 Sherrif" one). His mom had finally come downstairs and they were all enjoying a nice morning and a nice breakfast. 

Still, it itched. It was his wolf, snarling at something. 

"Hey, Scotty, everything alright?"

"Yeah... just, something's bothering me, and I don't know what..."

"Well, that may explain why you started walking north instead of, you know, towards your bike."

"Huh?" It was true - his feet had carried him towards the back of the house instead of the sidewalk where Roscoe and Linda were parked. He shook his head, trying to focus on the fact that he needed to go to school - he needed to if he wanted to get into a good Vet School - but the wolf was relentless, almost trying to drag him in that direction. Scott took a couple of breaths in and tried to push him to the back of his head, a long day in school ahead. 

He barely made it to lunch. By the time he sat down with the whole pack - sans Allison, since she and her father had gone up to Oregon to check on some hunters - not only was he too antsy and distressed, he was making everyone else distressed. 

"Dude, my dad already called me twice to check in on you. He also said that Melissa tried to reach your phone."

"I know, I texted her saying I was fine."

"Well, you are not." Isaac was looking like his 'Derek just bit me' self, almost ready to take his claws out and rip someone else apart. "I don't know what's going on but it's definitely seeping through and as much as I'd like to kill someone, I don't think Melissa or John would be happy with the idea."

"It's not killing - I don't want to kill anyone, but the wolf is..."

"Anxious, enraged and willing to take no prisoners." Even Lydia seemed to be affected, though it didn't seem that different from her usual self. "And since Isaac has been feeling it progressively, just like the rest of us, while you felt it since you woke up, it means it's something alpha related. Have you called Derek?"

"He's been outside for the past hour. I think he's guarding us." Scott could feel the members of his pack now, as long as they were close enough.

"Besides, he can't just waltz into the school again, not after the oh so many times he did it." Danny was poking at his school lunch with too much force, something very unusual for him. "Why am I feeling it too? I'm just human, right?"

"Well, I am feeling it too."

"But you've been a member of this pack longer, Stilinski."

"Guys, please. It's me. I need to be able to control this."

"Or leave running as soon as the bell rings. We'll cover for you in Lacrosse."

"I should probably come too," Isaac raised his face from his plate, "in case you need more werewolf help. I'm assuming Derek is coming?"

Stiles and Scott's cellphones both ringed at the same time.

"Derek's saying he just called in sick to the station."

"My dad's asking why Derek just called in sick to the station."

"Well, that means you three are going as soon as we are done, and you and Danny are going to distract Finstock in lacrosse. Text Derek asking him for possible ideas why you are acting like this so I can start some research, since Allison is not around."

Scott tapped his fingers quickly to his phone. Not a minute later he had an answer.

"Territory."

"Well, that narrows it down beautifully. Can he be more specific?"

"Here - text him, you can formulate your questions better."

"Sometimes I wonder if we should not use at least an encrypted phone or anything." Everybody raised their eyebrows to Danny. "What? I'm thinking like a lawyer here - all of this could be used against us in court."

"Are there werewolf courts?"

"With all the amount of shit we've been through, I'd say no. Derek's given me some ideas, but I agree with him - it's gonna boil down to a wolf passing through. Though I wonder why is your wolf so relentless about it - wasn't there an omega a while ago? Did Derek act like this?"

"No... but then again, he's been a werewolf his whole life while I'm still a little over a year old?" Lydia just hummed at him while texting from Scott's phone. With the idea in his head that they were all going to do something later his wolf retreated to a corner in his brain, waiting to be unleashed. That allowed him to finish the day without any more twitches (Finstock had looked at him funnily) and they all went to the parking lot where Derek was waiting for them. 

"Scott, you need to control your wolf better."

"You've also felt it?"

"Since this morning. I'm surprised Isaac didn't go and try kill someone - I've been wanting to, that's why I came here."

"I wanted to."

"Not just him, all of us felt it." Derek raised an eyebrow. "Not that many humans in your previous packs, were there?" Derek shook his head at Stiles' question.

"Still, dad never went off like this. How are the Sheriff and Melissa coping with it?"

"Dad broke three plates trying to put the dishwasher - and he's been texting me all day, arguing with me about nonsense instead of the deputies."

"Mom hasn't said anything. I'm assuming she's fine since she's always been pretty calm - if she's overly sarcastic then she's probably coping with it better than us. She'd have called if something had happened. Alright, Stiles, Danny, make something up for Finstock. Derek, you, Isaac and I are going to check what the hell is going on. Lydia, do we meet you at the house?"

"Definitely. Stiles, Danny - I want you there as soon as you are done with practice AND you have showered. Got it?" Both boys nodded at her and everybody nodded at Scott. Isaac and Scott dropped their stuff in Derek's car and the two werewolves nodded subtly at Scott, acknowledging his authority. The wolf wanted to run, but he wasn't stupid - he didn't know how much he needed to run, so he told them to get in the car and start driving. 

A couple hours later Derek parked his Toyota in a little sightseeing spot, and they started running from there - whoever was invading their territory was deep into the woods. Good - they didn't need to attract anyone's attention. 

Except that deep into the woods turned into _really deep_ into the woods. Scott actually had them stop (even if the wolf was in full pursuit mode) just so they could check they were able to GPS their location.

A couple more hours later, with the sun disappearing in the horizon the wolf inside him flared. His ears caught the roar carried by the wind and he knew they had found what they were looking for. 

The werewolf was aggressive and feral, but his eyes were still gold. It reeked of youth and blood in his jaws, but it was deer and rabbit. He was dressed in jeans that were ripped in too many places, and his feet were full of dirt and grime. His claws were out and Scott could see where he had hurt himself across his shirt (he didn't understand how it was still on him, torn as it was) and his brown hair was unkempt and wild. When he finally realized of their presence - they all could see that his senses were overstimulated - he roared at them and proceeded to attack. He felt Derek and Isaac morph out, but Scott only drew his eyes red and roared against the werewolf. 

A roar that reverberated through the forest. A roared that reached the core of the werewolf in front of him and scared him into submission, now cowered in fear, trembling at the sight in front of him, head cowed and yipping. 

Scott blinked. He could tell now what had attracted him so much to this wolf, even if he was barely at the outskirts of his territory (how far along did his territory extend? He needed to check that). It was the fact that he was not a wild omega running through his woods, insulting him for not acknowledging his authority. 

It was the fact that he was a kid, probably bitten against his will or unaware, just like he had been when Peter had closed his jaws against his torso. 

"Hey! Hey..." He approached the wolf slowly - he knew the animal had taken over and he probably wouldn't be able to reach the boy underneath for a while, so he extended his right hand, giving him an opening he could smell. "Hey, it's alright, sorry about that - you were to attack my friends." The wolf raised his hands, still trembling, but recognized the opening, and started crouching towards it. Scott stopped and started descending to his level, his eyes still red but his face completely human. The wolf growled when he broke a branch and both Derek and Isaac wanted to spring but he stopped them with a glare. The wolf approached his hand again and started smelling it, and Scott focused on smelling the same way he did when he snuggled with Stiles, when he slept with Isaac next to him, when he hugged Derek, when he kissed Allison, when Lydia sat with her back against his when they were reading for English. He wanted to smell like safety and protection, like those things he had needed when Peter bit him and instead he had felt anger and rage and the will of his maker trying to erase his own. The wolf let his head press against Scott's palm, and started rubbing himself against it. Scott just started caressing his hair, and slowly the features of the wolf started receding to let the man behind show. When he opened his eyes they were brown and not golden, and looked at him with a question in his face. 

Before he fainted on his arms. 

"Scott!"

"It's OK, it's OK. You can tell he's tired, probably been acting out as a wolf for days now." Scott scooped him up, making sure the guy was as comfortable as possible in the princess carry that he was doing. "We are taking him home."

Neither Isaac nor Derek questioned their alpha. They just walked next to him until they reached the car.


	3. Chapter II

This was not his pillow, he could tell that. 

Even when they traveled so much, or maybe because of it, Noah had developed a strange attachment to a pillow he had once used in a hotel in Iowa. It fitted him so perfectly he had stolen it. His mom had given him an earful, but ever since he had traveled with it everywhere. He also had written down model and fabricator and after a long time wading through the internet he had managed to buy a couple more, just so it wouldn't look so weird. He still had the info in his laptop. 

A laptop he no longer had access to. He never will. 

It was still comfy. It was warm, and it smelled nice. It smelled of home. It smelled of _alpha_. 

That forced his eyes open. He tried to get up but the world swam around him and he felt dizzy. He tried to support himself but his arms felt weak so he ended up back on the bed and blinking out the lights that appeared out of nowhere. 

"Wow, wow - hey, Scott! He's up! - you shouldn't do that, man, you're gonna get the IV out!" He heard a rustle and then there were a couple of hands helping him back in a comfortable position. He smelled weird, like moss and water and petrichor but also a chemical stench and something that made him want to run - _adrenaline_? But lingering around him was also the sweet smell of the alpha that had taken him in, like he was marked and that told him enough of where he was. 

A werewolf den. 

He tried to recoil but the boy's hands were surprisingly strong - more like he knew where to grip him so he couldn't move. Besides, he was still too tired, to weak to do so. So he just let himself go limp, but moving away from him. He heard more heartbeats coming through and suddenly soft hands were checking on him, taking his pulse, opening his eyes when he wanted to keep them shut and murmuring that he looked fine, and that the IV was still half way full so they didn't need to change it. 

"How is he, mom?"

"Well, he's recoiling at my touch, but he seems fine."

He opened his eyes to find the alpha looking at him in concern, a beautiful woman standing next to him. They looked to be mother and son, but only he smelled of wolf - she smelled of warmth and hospitals and chocolate. Maybe she was a doctor?

"Hey." The alpha smiled at him and the first thing Noah thought was that that smile belonged to Colgate TV ads. It just shined. Maybe it was that he was looking at it through werewolf senses, that they were fascinated by having an alpha so close? The boy certainly _radiated_ warmth and happiness, like he was a monstrous teenage puppy or something like that. Not the monster that had bitten him. No, he had killed that creature. 

He felt the alpha's hand coming closer and he turned away from it. 

"Please don't." He wasn't sure they could hear him. 

Of course they could. They were werewolves. 

"What did he say?"

Well, not all of them. 

"It's alright. You're safe. You're OK."

"No, I'm not. I'm an abomination."

"What? No! You're not. You just have a condition."

Noah couldn't help but snort. "Is that what you call it? A condition? Do I get medical benefits for having the urge to kill my friends once every month?"

"Hey! It only happens the first couple of months, and all you need is a good chain and that's it!" The skinny boy that smelled like moss and petrichor yelled at him. "No need to be so negative! It's only a furry little problem!"

"You are human?" Noah gave a whiff instinctively, and yes, the doctor and the boy were human - only the alpha was a wolf, and the other one coming towards the room. 

"Yeah. And who do you think taught Scotty boy here how to control his shift?" The alpha - Scotty? - smiled at the boy and then smiled back to Noah. The wolf inside Noah wanted to show neck, to flop belly up and wait to be rubbed, but Noah was trained not to show emotion, not to show weakness, so he just glared at them. The other werewolf had finally reached the door and was looking at him warily. He knew he had to be afraid of him - maybe he was The Left Hand?

"He's a hunter."

"What?"

"He's thinking of killing himself. He's trying to avoid contact in case the wolf in him overrides him with a survival instinct."

"Oh."

Scott's face showed surprise, and the doctor's showed pain - she looked so much like a mother protecting her son, even if she didn't know him. But the boy's, the mossy one, changed subtly to indicate that he was not just a stray puppy that they had picked up - he was a potential threat. 

Now Noah wondered if that kid was not The Left Hand. 

"We'll need -"

"I'll go get her." The boy interrupted the alpha, very clearly not wanting Noah to know who he was going to fetch. He felt his own guard put up - there was a window to his right, the door was guarded by big bad wolf and he would have to override the alpha and the doctor before even reaching him, so it had to be the window. He assumed they were on a second floor and while the jump would not kill him, he was too weak to run too far. 

"Don't." The doctor spoke. "First, young man, you are too weak to even think about jumping out of the window. Second, nothing is going to happen to you, Stiles just went to fetch Allison."

"Allison?"

"My girlfriend. Mine and Isaac's. Nevermind, that's not important now. She's a hunter. She can help you with the whole abomination thing." Scott had smiled dreamily when he said girlfriend and even _more_ when he said Isaac and he could detect a bit of arousal in the air. The doctor cuffed the boy in the head and told him to focus. "Anyways, she's part of the pack, too, you'll se that it's not so bad, being a werewolf."

"Wait, she's a werewolf and a hunter?"

"No - she's just a hunter, but she has two werewolf boyfriends."

"Two?"

"Don't dwell on it, it'll give you a headache." The doctor's smile was so sweet he couldn't help but smile back at her. He bit it back immediately, though, he was still in hostile territory and he needed to guard himself. He heard the footsteps of Stiles and what he assumed to be Allison coming towards and sure enough, everybody but the doctor turned to the door when both of them appeared. The girl discussing with him ("No, Stiles, just because he's a hunter doesn't mean he was hunting in the area - we don't even know who bit him, that should be our first line of research") stopped by the door and looked at him quizzically, like she was trying to place him somewhere. She looked so familiar, the stance typical for a hunter, but her wavy black hair he had seen before, and those eyes, and...

"Allie?"

"Noah?" She asked in wonder, like she was seeing a ghost. Then he remembered - he was supposed to be dead, she had to assume he was dead. So he nodded, trying to tell her with his eyes that he didn't want to die (Did he? Or was it the wolf talking?). "Noah! DAD! COME UPSTAIRS! IT'S NOAH! HE'S ALIVE!" She threw herself at him, hugging him so strongly the doctor had to tell her not to be so efusive, but he drunk her smell in and yes, it smelled of fire and sweetness and _family_ and he made the effort to hug her back and yes, she smelled like the alpha but it was a good smell, a smell he relished, a smell his wolf relished and didn't want to abandon, a smell that he wanted to drown himself in, a smell -

He withdrew. He was not supposed to attach to anything, to anyone. He was supposed to die, remember?

"Hey... It's the training, isn't it? You, wanting to kill yourself?" Noah nodded, seeing the concern in her eyes. "Well, fuck that. My mom killed herself because of it, but trust me, werewolves are not bad. And if you are worried about a werewolf pack finding out about our hunting strategies, well, I already screwed that up." She smiled a bit at that and he couldn't help but chuckle. 

"Noah?" His uncle - it was hard to forget those gray eyes - was at the door now, and just like Allie relief showed in his face. At least he didn't jump ahead to hug him. "How are you feeling?"

"Too many scents? And this pillow feels great? Or at least, it smells fantastic."

"It's because it's Scott's." The tall and muscly werewolf answered. "You are an omega, and you were injured. Being close to an alpha is calming enough that is letting you heal."

"I was not supposed to heal." Noah mumbled. He knew all the werewolves heard but Allie and Uncle Chris also frowned their eyebrows. 

"Melissa, do you think we can talk to him? Just Allie and me?"

"Sure. Everybody, you heard the man - OUT!" Noah felt his insides squirm at the doctor's authority, like it was higher than the alpha's - probably because she was his mother? - and everyone, including Stiles, left the room, until he was alone with Allie and Uncle Chris. Part of him wanted the alpha to stay too, and it must've shown because Allie grabbed his hand in comfort. 

"Want to tell us what happened?"

"We were on a hunt, the four of us. A wild pack in Oregon, it was making the news. We managed to kill half clean but the other half noticed us and chased us. Bloodbath. We basically killed each other. The alpha went for me, bit me, I killed him with my knife. I tried to follow protocol but for a split second I didn't want to die and the wolf took over. I can't recall much after that, just that at some point I woke up here, and that everybody has been unnaturally kind to me. They didn't know who I was and they took me in?"

Allie chuckled. "That'd be Scott to you. He probably sensed you invading his territory and instead of slitting your throat he brought you back. He's like that."

"What do you mean?"

"Scott is... a very different kind of werewolf from what we Argents are used to." Uncle Chris started, a glint of pride in his eyes. "He's proven himself to be a decent werewolf and a great human being. Always trying to find the solution that involved killing the least amount of people. Sometimes failing spectacularly, true, but always looking to protect those around him. That has given him a particular kind of power - unlike other alphas, who kill in order to gain their power, or inherit them from older members of their packs, Scott is something called a True Alpha. We still don't know the true extent of what that means, but I wouldn't be surprised if you as an omega reacted differently than what we would've expected: that is, to flee or to challenge him."

"I challenged him. But he didn't take it. He roared me into submission. After that, all I could feel was him radiating warmth, like he was a fireplace in a house - no, in a home, and I wanted to feel that heat. And that's when I blacked out, I think. I'm not even sure about what I'm telling you - the wolf was in control. I just remember glimpses of it."

He felt something on his cheek, and wiping it he realized he was crying. Allie just cradled his hand while Uncle Chris had reached the bed and sat down. 

"Noah, I know that right now you are feeling your mother's voice telling you that you need to kill yourself. It is what we were trained to do. I'm asking you not to. See, we've been wrong about werewolves. Not all of them are animals like we think. We - Allison and I - have been taken in by this pack, and we've learned a lot from them. They are people, just like you are."

"Is this where you tell me that nothing is different?"

"Everything is different, Noah. What I am telling you is that it's not the end of the world, like you may be thinking right now."

Noah wanted to believe that, but he couldn't. He was thinking of asking his uncle to kill him, but it seemed that he wouldn't do it. He looked to Allie to ask her for it - she was the matriarch, after all. He had heard of Aunt Victoria's death a few months ago. 

"What do you want?" Allie's voice was calm, collected, but warm. He knew he could ask her for it, and she would grant it. Sweet release. 

But did he really want to die? He tried to shut the voices in his head, his mom's and his father's and even Michael's, until he could only hear his own. He even tried to shut the growling of the wolf that felt so much like his own voice, and managed to get a moment of silence inside his head. 

What did _he_ want?

And no matter how hard he tried to believe he wanted to die, he didn't. 

"I want to finish high school." Allie looked surprised and Uncle Chris raised an eyebrow, but they understood. He wanted to live. 

Even if that made him a bad hunter. 

"Alright. Why don't you go back to sleep, and we'll see what we are going to do in the morning?" Allie hugged him again and Uncle Chris patted him on the head. Strangely, he felt tired again, but not in the sense of blacking out, just in the sense that he needed to stop moving and just rest. He let his head fall back in that pillow that wasn't his and yet felt great and saw both Allie and his Uncle leave him, closing the door. 

He didn't realize he fell asleep. He just remembered smelling the pillow again, and feeling comfortable with the idea of staying.


	4. Chapter III

This time Noah woke up when someone's stomach rumbled. His. 

Unlike last time the world didn't swim around him. As a matter of fact, he felt pretty good bar the hunger he felt. He even stopped to flex his hands - he didn't feel weak anymore. He felt invigorated. 

He also felt watched. In the chair next to the door muscly werewolf was looking at him, trace of amusements written on his face. 

"Liking what you feel?"

"Shut up." The werewolf just smiled more brightly, and maybe a bit more wickedly.

"Alright. Melissa, he's up! Don't move, there's rowan around the bed." Noah looked down and saw the black line surrounding him, while the werewolf left the room. He extended his arm and surely an electric blue light flashed. It even burned his hand a little bit. 

"Careful!" The doctor was coming through with the werewolf behind her carrying a large tray of food. As she approached the line the ash parted breaking the barrier and letting her in. He couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at her. "Trust me, I don't know. As far as we know only Stiles and I can do it without hands, everyone else has to physically touch it. How are you feeling?" She started fuzzing around him, checking for his temperature, flashing a light on his eyes, the whole doctor crap he would go through whenever he landed in a hospital. 

"I'm OK, I think, Doctor."

"Melissa, and I'm a nurse."

"So you are a werewolf nurse?"

"More like someone who started paying attention at how your biology works so I'd know what to write in the reports whenever any of my sons ended up in the hospital. Your eyes seem fine, dilation is working alright and you are still flashing. Temperature's OK, breathe for me," she put the stethoscope on his back and he counted, four in, two out, "sounds good. Pain anywhere? Dizzyness? You were pretty dehydrated."

"No, no - I feel fine. Really."

"In that case, Derek?" Muscles - Derek - moved forward and dropped the tray in front of him, eggs, ham, veggies, oj, even bacon. His mouth started watering as soon as the smells hit his nose. "Tuck in, I've seen how werewolves eat, chop chop!" Noah started _inhaling_ the food, he was so hungry he only stopped to make sure he was still breathing. Halfway through he stopped.

"Sons?"

"Hm? Ah, you noticed. Keep eating." He did. "Scott is my biological son. He and Stiles had been together forever, and I've been some sort of mom to Stiles after Claudia died until I finally married his father and we became a slightly larger family unit. Isaac we adopted him after someone threw him out of his apartment." The phrase had turned accusative and Melissa had looked very pointedly at Derek, who had the good graces of looking ashamed. "And Derek here basically followed them like a kicked puppy for a good portion of the year, so of course I took him in. They are all my sons." Noah noticed the small change in Derek's hearbeat when she said that, but didn't comment on it. 

"So you are basically a ragtag pack?"

"Pretty much. We have Allison and his dad, and that was a Romeo and Juliet story between her and Scott. Lydia, John - that's my husband - and of course poor Danny who ended up roped into this when his boyfriend tried to kill him. Don't ask. So yeah, we are a pretty ragtag pack, but I like to think of them as my family." She turned and ruffled Derek's hair, who smiled like a boy who wasn't to be petted by his mother while loving all of it. "My boys." Something tugged inside Noah's heart.

Later he would realize it was envy. For all the love his family have, there was that military streak that prevented them from being overtly expressive with their love. And something inside him had always craved it. 

"Melissa? Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, go ahead, as long as you keep eating." Her smile seemed to illuminate the half eaten plate, so he continued eating. 

"What's it like, to have werewolf sons? You are human."

"You are getting pretty good at identifying smells." Derek frowned. 

"Am I?"

"Derek, don't. What do you mean? Besides the increase in the grocery bill?" Her small laugh was heartened. But her eyes sombered a little. "Scott was bitten a little over a year ago, and I found out a couple of months later, when a bastard with your last name used me to threaten him. Yes, it was an Argent. I couldn't look at him for about a week. I was scared out of my mind, I wouldn't even let him explain himself. God, I was such a bad mother then."

"Melissa, no. You weren't." Derek had put his hand on her shoulder, anchoring her. 

"I was, don't patronize me. I wouldn't look at him in the eye until I realized that he had been a werewolf for months, and that he had changed. I thought it was drugs, you know? Coming home late, red eyes, drop in grades. And I wondered how much I had failed him, as a mom. Before that we used to be so close, he'd tell me everything, including the crush he had on the beautiful girl that had just moved into town. But it deteriorated so quickly." She shuddered. Derek moved his hand to a half hug. "So I revisited all our interactions with the idea that he was hiding being a werewolf from me and it all made sense. He spent four months trying to protect me from everything that was happening to him. That's when I realized he was still my little boy, and from then onwards it was a matter of communication. Well, and the one time I was almost sacrificed to a Celtic Sacred Grove to restore its powers." Noah opened his eyes in fear but she was not joking. "I can't say it was not horrible, but I won't deny that it's been good in the long run. Our family increased. We have each other now. No, no one goes killing anyone at any point, but we have had some people come at us. They usually don't come out pretty good."

"They don't?"

"At some point you'll have to ask Chris about that Argent." Noah looked down to his plate, ashamed for what he was hearing. He tried to stuff his mouth to prevent himself from talking but the food was gone. "Want more? You feeling up to walk down the kitchen?" Noah nodded. Melissa helped him get up, but as soon as his feet touched the floorboards he felt like he wanted to run. "It seems that you are healing better than expected. I still want to keep an eye on you, dehydration can be pretty dangerous. Here, let me get that out of your hand." His hand stung for a bit when she took out the IV but it healed immediately, she didn't even bothered to clean it with rubbing alcohol. The floorboards felt warm under his feet and he found himself stretching, like a big cat - or a dog - under the sun. "Come on." Noah followed her downstairs - Derek was on his back, but he was not flanking him - and they reached the kitchen, where a man with a police uniform and a mug of coffee was reading the news. He smiled at Melissa and kissed her. 

"John Stilinski, sheriff of Beacon Hills." Noah shook his hand. He was human, and his scent reminded him of the gangly kid that had been with him the day before - was it the day before?

"Excuse me, how long have I been out?"

"Sit down and eat some cookies while we get something going." Melissa was already taking out some pans and Derek was helping getting stuff out of the fridge. "Scott found you last Friday, and you woke up the first time Tuesday. Today is Thursday. I was concerned that it took you so long to wake up, but Deaton came over and he couldn't find anything wrong with you, so we believe you were preventing yourself from healing."

"Can you do that?"

"When you feel guilty, or when you are stressed." Derek provided. "When you started healing after talking to Allison and Chris we theorized that Scott may have snapped you out of ferality and that let the part of your brain that wants to kill yourself take over, preventing the healing from going on. You were not injured, just dehydrated - and when we picked you up you seemed like you had some bunnies for dinner." Noah gagged at the idea. "You look good to me now."

"Who's Deaton?"

"Local vet, Scott's boss, used to be the emissary for my family pack. Now he's more neutral, though he does care for Scott."

"Your family pack?"

"My name is Derek Hale."

Oh.

"I heard about that. Sorry."

"No need." Noah saw that Derek was reclusing himself so he decided to keep eating the cookies while Melissa made more eggs and some french toast. 

"Hm. Where's everybody?"

"They are all high schoolers, kiddo - they are in high school. Which brings me to the question, what are you going to do?" The Sheriff had remained quiet for all their conversation, but apparently he was too curious about his answer. 

"I... I don't know. I mean..." Noah looked at the knife he was holding. It was a kitchen knife, not even that sharp - he could barely cut the French toast with it, and yet he already knew he could ram it down his nose to prevent brain signatures or stick it through his throat and then with a motion serrate the jugular and by keeping it there it would prevent the wound from healing. "A part of me insists that I should die, that I am an abomination. But I just want to finish high school?"

"What year are you?"

"I was supposed to start Senior Year this Monday, after the hunt."

"The school's only been going for the week here too, we can get you up and running if you want."

"Where would I live?"

"This house is big enough, if you are willing to share room with Isaac or Scott or Stiles."

"What about Uncle Chris?"

"We can ask him. Don't worry about that, you are more than welcome to stay."

"Why? Why are you been so welcoming? I could go back to my hunting ways and kill you, you know that?"

"You won't." Derek was looking at him again, hermetic expression on his face.

"How do you know that?"

"Because you are scared. Because a part of you is already questioning all that training that you had. We've all gone through that at some point - well, maybe not the Sheriff."

"Trust me, when Stiles was going through his kitsunesuki phase I was scared out of my mind. Particularly because of what it entailed."

"Could you two stop it? It's morning, we are not discussing sad stuff, besides, we want him to like us, remember?" Melissa smiled at him again and again he felt that pull in his heart. "Come on, eat up, then we'll get you some clothes and settle you in front of the TV. Derek will stay here and watch you until Chris comes back - he said he had to arrange some stuff now that you are alive - or maybe the kids will get here first."

"Where are you going?"

"Our jobs. Just because we have werewolves in the house doesn't mean the bills pay themselves. As a matter of fact, they got worse."

"Hey, at least you were not paying a mortgage!"

"At least property taxes went down because you married me!" Melissa and the Sheriff kissed and Noah couldn't help but watch in some sort of weird fascination, like he couldn't believe how much love they were putting into it - since they had been bickering. Derek snorted at him. 

"You'll get used to it. You look like Stiles, his clothes should fit you."

"I don't look like him!"

"Sure you do: tall, gangly, and probably crash every single object you come across to, don't you?" Noah just moved his head acknowledging the statement. 

He was not _gangly_.


	5. Chapter IV

"Hm. We need to take you shopping. Like, right now."

"What, why?" Noah stared in horror at the red head - Lydia.

"Because I can only be seen with one person wearing Stiles' wardrobe."

"What is wrong with my wardrobe?"

"You are coming too, you may learn something. Allison? Make sure you get your dad's credit card."

"Lydia, I am not sure this qualifies as a pack expense."

"He's your cousin, I'm pretty sure that entails getting him new clothes."

"Fine, let me see what he says." She dialed her cellphone. 

"Scott - you coming too, buddy?"

"Er, no - gotta work dude." Stiles literally seemed to panic after that response. Noah wondered why.

"Isaac?"

"Are you serious? Besides, me and Danny have to work on the Physics homework. Homework you and Scott should be doing, too." Noah looked at the tall guy and for all the barb and sarcasm he was spouting, he smelled of fear. Same as Stiles'. 

_They were all afraid of_ her _? She was 5'4"!_

"Derek?" Stiles basically croaked. 

"No." He did get off the couch he had shared with Noah for the day and got his wallet out, pushing a black credit card on Noah's chest. "In case you want to buy something not Lydia approved." 

"Dad says that I can use the Amex, as long as you don't go overboard." She turned from Lydia to him. "Don't worry, it was something we were going to do anyways."

"You know, Lydia, Isaac's right - maybe I should stay and work on the - WOAH!" Lydia basically grabbed him by the collar of his t-shirt and started dragging him. Noah looked at everybody else, unsure if he should follow or run for his life. 

The three males looked like they wanted him to run for his life. Allison looped an arm around his and started walking. 

"Come on, it won't be that bad." Then she looked at everybody else. "Well, not much."

Stiles kept them entertained during the drive since he kept complaining loudly about what was wrong with his wardrobe, which apparently included a lot of plaid and used to have blazers. Allison just sat next to him, smiling every once in a while in his direction, like an anchor he could latch himself to and try not to think about falling from a moving car. 

It felt odd, and comforting, being driven around Beacon Hills. First of all, every corner they turned, every streetlight they stopped at, every shop they passed by smelled of the alpha. But it was not just it. The ground under his feet felt warm, and pulsing, like energy was somehow flowing below, rivers of it crisscrossing around, but all of them flowing into and out of the forest. He couldn't help but look towards that point that seemed to be the source and sink of it.

"It's called a Nemeton." Noah jumped at Stiles' voice, a bit too close and a bit too low and a bit too _warm_ and for a moment the colors vibrated and the air was thicker and he could hear everyone's heartbeats. For a moment he wanted to slash his claws in front of him. "Hey, watch it with the eyes, pretty boy! We're out in public."

"It'd do good if you were not scaring him. Noah, breathe." Allie looked annoyed at Stiles, who, after Noah managed to calm himself down, started giggling. 

In perspective, it was funny that one of the two humans without training in their little entourage was the one to provoke the werewolf. The recently bitten, barely in control werewolf. Apparently the kid didn't have a self-preservation instinct. 

"Stiles, if you keep laughing at Noah I'll bleed your ears off." That sobered Stiles immediately. She must've caught his questioning stare, because she immediately (and quietly) said the word 'Banshee' to him before entering the store.

"Wait, you are a fairy? You are a fucking fairy?"

"Fae, Noah, I'm fae. And if you call me a fairy I'll bleed _your_ ears off."

He remembered hearing a quote from Charlize Theron, something about shoulders down, neck long, thinking _murder_ and just walk. Looking at Lydia Martin strutting her way inside the store he finally understood it. He also understood why everyone, except maybe Allison - who was walking next to her - seemed to be afraid of her. 

"She is that scary. She's also pretty awesome, and somewhat perfect. Come on, you are going to be her Ken Doll to dress up for the next couple of hours."

"Will I get a saying?"

"That depends, how much like me you dressed before?"

"Nothing at all, this shirt is hideous."

"She may let you have an opinion."

If Noah had to admit something, was that Stiles was some sort of contradiction. He was pretty sure the boy didn't like him at all, but seemed to try really hard to seem... _cordial_? Like one of those persons that can make you feel like hell with their wit and refrain from doing so because their parents scolded them too much when they were little. He had to admit that that made him look endearing, like he was trying very hard not to insult him, if not for his sake maybe for the sake of others (Allie?). 

He also kept smelling of petrichor and moss, and that was soothing, just like the cinnamon and chocolate smell from the alpha that encompassed the whole town. 

"Noah Argent! You keep me waiting one more second and I'll make sure your high school life is hell!" Noah went running towards Lydia that mere second.

A couple of hours later, he found himself with enough clothes to survive. Lydia seemed to differ on his opinion since she wanted to go to more stores, but a look from him to Allie seemed to be enough to get her to talk about the credit card limit. Lydia countered with the card he got from Derek, saying that they still needed to get Stiles new shoes. So, they kept shopping. At some point it became about the girls getting new stuff and Noah and Stiles were left behind, in which they surreptitiously went to the food court and got really greasy burgers and coke. 

"So, what do you think so far?"

"I've only been aware of my surroundings for twelve hours, Stiles, I'm not sure I can make an opinion."

"Most people just give this little town a glance and keep on their way."

"Well, most people don't feel the energy flowing under it, right?"

"Right."

Noah hesitated. He wanted to be upfront with the kid - if they didn't like him, why were they putting up with him? Just to keep him from killing himself?

"No, but really, what do you think?"

"Huh? I don't know, Stiles. I keep thinking I should swallow a bite to big for my throat and choke to death."

"Dude, it's not funny."

"It's not funny the way you looked at me when big guy said I was a hunter."

"Well, I didn't know your intentions! For all I knew you were part of a hunter family bent on destroying Scott and I had to stop you! I try not to form relationships with people who may murder me, you know, it's not good for my health."

"Ever done that before?"

"No one told you how Scott and I met Derek?"

"The doctor - no, nurse -"

"Melissa."

"Right, Melissa, said that he followed Scott like a kicked puppy?" Stiles started laughing so hard that he snorted some coke out of his nostril and half the food court looked at them. Noah wanted to bury himself in the ground, but Stiles looked like this happened to him a bit too frequently to give any more fucks. 

"A kicked puppy. You can say that. We framed him for murder twice."

"What?"

"Well, not frame him, more like we didn't know all the facts and without that one piece it looked like he was the murderer, so we turned in him to my dad. Twice. Derek's uncle, Peter, was the alpha then, and he bit Scott. Since he was catatonic at the time Derek never suspected him and the way Derek approached Scott made us think he was the alpha, so we ended up, ahem, not making things easy for him. Boy, he was a creep back then, but when you find out why, it's really understandable. You are seeing a good side of him, trust me. He would've never lent any of us, least of all of us me, his credit card."

"Why? He is afraid I'll max it or something? I mean, I'll pay him back - we only got the hoodie and the shoes..."

"Nah, it's not that - he's rich as fuck, don't worry. It's more that he didn't use to trust people, and really, not that easily. He must've seen something in you - or Scott did and he's trusting you."

"You don't trust me."

"Like I said, I thought you were after us. My default mode is search and destroy."

"So you are the Left Hand?"

"What's that?"

"You don't know?" Stiles shook his head sipping more soda. "He's the enforcer of the pack, the one who kills whenever the alpha can't get his hands dirty. Usually the most vicious or the most psychotic member of the pack."

"Whoa, dude, we don't kill. Didn't Chris tell you that Scott's a True Alpha? Sheer force of will, no killings, and the times we've been threatened, we try not to kill... much. I personally haven't done any killings... directly."

"You are rambling."

"Yes I am. Fine, if you are going to hang out with us is better if you know -"

"Kitsunetsuki."

"How do you know?"

"Your dad mentioned you having a phase that almost... that was not good."

"No, it wasn't. Pain, Strife, Chaos. Those three words used to define me, you know? Still do, but at least now I'm at peace with them, instead of curling like a ball of angst in my bed. Anyways, yes, some bloodshed happened then, but it was completely unintentional."

"So who's the Left Hand then?"

"Do we need to have one?"

Noah shrugged. He'd been with these people less than two days and they were already shattering every single thing he knew about werewolves. 

"Then we don't."

"What about muscles? Derek?"

"Derek? Nah, he's too good. I mean, he'll kill if he needs to - that's why his eyes are blue - but he avoids it. Not as much as Scott though."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why does he avoid killing?"

"Have you seen Scott? He's a fucking ray of sunshine. Anyways, enough about Scott. What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Well, you are eating three mickey d's with someone who flat out said doesn't trust you and based on the amount of clothes Lydia ordered for you you are staying around. At least give me the honor of telling me who the fuck are you."

Noah couldn't help but smile a little bit at the guy's expression. He was too expressive, too open about menial things, an ability that surely made him great for reconnaissance, since no one would pay attention to him. He was also cute - he surely was a hit with the ladies. 

"I'm no one." Stiles raised his eyebrow. "Well, what do you want me to say? Technically I died a week ago."

"No, you didn't, you gained a condition."

"Fine. I became sick last week."

"OK, Noah, this is how it's going to work: you are going to tell me three things about you, which do not include hunting, and then you are going to either let me be wowed by them or mock them. Understood?"

"Who died and made you the leader?"

"Oh, no one - I'm just this bossy most of the time."

"How does Scott put up with you? He's the alpha?"

"Scott adores me. And you are deflecting the conversation."

Fuck, he was good. 

Noah looked at the last third of his third Big Mac. He wasn't sure why he was so adamant about answering those questions. Was it that a portion of his brain still wanted to kill himself? Or was it something else? Maybe he didn't want to sound like the big loser he was? He barely had any friends in school, moving as much as he did because of their hunting ways, and whenever he actually made one or two friends they ended up rejecting him because of his hobbies. 

Well, they were friends with Allie. They couldn't be that different, right?

"I like photography, I am pretty good at gymnastics, and I've been taking advanced mathematics classes since I was 13. I already know how to solve Partial Differential Equations and in the computer I used to have I was playing with some flow modelling. I wanted to use it to understand the dispersion of wolfsbane vapors in certain environments to use as little as possible to incapacitate werewolves. There, happy?"

"Wow, that's hot."

"You like advanced math?"

"No - I'm not exactly good at it, I'm better at research, Lydia's the math genius. She'll win a Field Medals. What do you use to do flow modelling?"

"My dad gave me an ANSIS Flow license for my birthday, that and a fancy ass computer. That I don't own anymore."

"Sorry. This was supposed to cheer you up, you know?"

"The shopping trip?"

"Eating burgers! God, you are a downer." Noah couldn't help but smile at his expression. "And now you are laughing at me. Go me. I try not to be like this when I'm on an actual date." Noah choked at his comment, but Stiles was not paying attention - his cell phone was ringing, and even without the speaker phone Noah was able to hear Lydia's voice, a couple octaves higher than usual. 

"Stiles Stilinski, where the hell are you?"

"Hey, Lydia, we were just eating while you beautiful ladies -"

"Don't you butter me up, Stiles! If you two are not in my car in five minutes I'll leave you here and you'll have to walk back! You know I mean it!"

Noah looked at Stiles with horror - he didn't know anything about this town, he would get lost! Stiles seemed to have the same ideas since he started to inhale the rest of his food while making excuses to Lydia. They got to the parking lot six minutes after Stiles hung up on her, but the two girls were waiting for them, smug smiles on their faces. 

"Well, did you two at least make out? You are not telling me you are making me late for three burgers and a coke each."

Noah was sure his heart skipped four beats. And from what his newly found hearing told him, Stiles did as well.


	6. Chapter V

Noah didn't hang out with the pack for the rest of the weekend. First of all, the drive back had been awkward enough with Allie and Lydia looking at the two of them furtively, and Stiles recoiled inside his own world in his side of the car - and, according to everyone, a quiet Stiles was a rare Stiles. The kid had immediately grabbed Scott and took him upstairs to a room that had the door slammed shut, and that had surprised everyone, including the boys' father. When they asked what happened Lydia tried to answer but Allie interrupted her, wonderful, glorious Allie, and their pack had to settle with a 'nothing' that was not nothing, but nobody pressed. But Noah did see that he would not be welcome in that house and followed Allie back to the Argent apartment. 

Melissa made sure he took the pillow he'd been using all week. It was not his pillow, but it would do. It definitely would. 

The Argent apartment felt _Argent_. It definitely felt much more like what he was used to. It wasn't cold or unwelcoming, but there was the smell of gunpowder and steel permeating through the walls, witness to all the weapons that were enclosed, ready to be used to hunt. No, _to protect_. Allie had been very clear about that - she was changing the code, and she was leading with the example. 

He was not one who hunt. He was one who hadn't been able to protect himself. 

Well, _that_ made him feel like a failure. 

His uncle had taken a different approach to him, and he was forever grateful for it. He just sat him down and talked to him, explaining the few rules they were to have if he was to stay. Always let him know where he was, particularly after dark. He will go to school and get good grades. He was free to do what he wanted, as long as someone knew what he was doing or it wouldn't get him in jail, and as long as he was back before midnight on a school night. Also, he was to sleep with rowan around his bed - apparently Scott had some issues with fugue states when he was newly turned because the alpha had tried to take control of his mind, and since they didn't know how the mind of an omega worked they needed to take precautions. Noah didn't mind. He understood he was dangerous. 

He almost smuggled a gun under his pillow, but Allie caught him. She said that she didn't want to wake up to a detonation in the middle of the night. He wondered if he was still too obvious about the idea of killing himself - or if he was just repeating patterns they had seen before in omega wolves. 

He didn't know much about the psychology of wolves - strategy and weapon development have always been his actual interests. He wanted to go to college for Engineering, with an specialization in weapon design. He knew he couldn't go to the US Air Force due to his extensive knowledge in weapons and hunting - it would raise a red flag when he got background checked and put the Argents on the goverment's eye which nobody wanted, and even draw the attention of the goverment to the supernatural and _that_ NOBODY wanted. So he would settle for an engineering school - _any_ engineering school, he didn't even want to go a fancy one - he didn't need to rack up debt against his name. 

Uncle Chris said that they had actually been able to recover some of his belongings, including his computer, most of his wardrobe, and the teddy bear he tried to hide from everyone but his mom. They also managed to get a pair of his old glasses - he had been using contacts during the hunt but those apparently dissolved when he became a werewolf (that or the werewolf pushed them out, but with claws he couldn't have done it without mauling his eyes) and he found himself removing the glass, keeping the frame, letting them be some sort of mask under which to hide. Monday morning, in fact, he was looking himself at the mirror, checking his outfit for the umptenth time (he had to go back and change after seeing how Allie was dressed to go to school) and giving himself a pep speech.

"It's alright. It's just school. You've done this before. You know what to do."

_Sit in the back. Hide from everyone else. Look for the photography club. Pretend you are no one and it'll all be alright._

When Allie said Lydia would be driving them he looked at Uncle Chris desperately. Thankfully his uncle caught on and decided to drive him himself. Allie did roll her eyes but she smiled when she looked at him in the eye. She also started texting which did nothing to calm his nerves.

"I thought the shopping had gone well, I don't understand why you don't want to hang out with them more."

"I'm not sure they like me."

"I can assure you they don't dislike you. Did something happen?" His uncle's eyes showed concern. "Did they... do something?"

"No! No... well, teenage antics?"

"Do I need to point my gun at someone?"

"No, not really. Really!" He had to chuckle a little bit because it was ridiculous that his uncle would threat anyone over the fact that he may be feeling a crush over Stiles and _did he just admitted that?_. 

He gulped. It was going to be a long day. 

It didn't start so bad. He found his locker without problem, and the map they gave him at the principal's office was actually understandable so he was able to find his classes without embarrassing himself by asking directions. He sat at the back, and was able to hide from everybody - though trying to dull the gossiping was hard because his ears kept picking up every single sound.

"You want to focus on one sound and one sound only. The teacher's voice, or your own heartbeat, of maybe the tapping you are doing with your foot. The trick is to have something to focus on, otherwise the wolf is alert, trying to discern potential threats. If you are focused on one the wolf understands that you are not under threat and your human side can pay attention."

Tall, blonde and cherubic was taking French too, though for the first six and a half minutes he had made a fantastic show of pretending he wasn't there. He wasn't even sitting nearby - the opposite side of the room, actually - but evidently he was keeping an eye on him. Allie and Lydia were too, now that he had turned to look at them. Allie smiled, Lydia huffed, and Isaac just raised his eyebrow. Noah pushed his glasses back and tried to focus on the lesson. Le Subjonctif. 

Advanced Econ, however, was a complete different story - he'd forgotten his book in his locker, so by the time he got to the classroom everybody was seated in their place. The only free seat was right behind Scott, and completely surrounded by the pack. He wondered if Isaac told them he was losing a bit of control. Worse, he hated that he relished in being surrounded by them. 

It was odd. He knew that as a wolf, he looked for a pack. But he didn't know if he wanted to be with them, or if they liked him. Or if they were doing this out of a civic duty just because he and Allie were related. Or just playing the policemen waiting for him to go in a killing rampage. 

"Calm down." One of the humans, the built one, talked to him - he had been sitting to his right and now was lingering back, waiting for Noah to pack his stuff. He could hear Allie's heartbeat by the door, but the rest of the pack had left. "You are overthinking this. We don't know if we like you because you haven't even interacted with us."

"What?"

"You have that Peter Parker look - 'I'm gonna hide in the back and pretend nobody notices me.' We notice you. We want to get to know you. Is it that bad?"

"You are doing it to keep an eye on me."

"Nah, we have your Uncle for that." Noah looked at him, startled. "This pack is huge, but it's also multi talented. Not all of us are wolves - hell, I'm still not sure I'm part of the pack. Derek and the Sheriff are the actual ones to keep an eye on things, being a deputy and Sheriff - they have reasons to roam the town rather than a bunch of kids walking around. Mr. Argent plans scoutings and all that stuff so when we have to do actual raids they occupy minimal time. I'm rather good with computers, so I access info that shouldn't exactly be available, and Stiles and Lydia are great at seeing things that are not there - in the case of Lydia, that may be literal. Yes, Scott and Isaac are werewolves but they are the only werewolves, and while they may be the strongest physically, we all act as a unit. It's what allows us to still be teenagers and not child soldiers. You should've seen the way Mrs. McCall destroyed Stiles one time when he skipped school to go see a dead body in the morgue when she was supposed to check it with Mr. Argent."

"And why would she go see a dead body?"

"She works at the hospital. She has access to the morgue. Nobody questions her."

"Wow."

"Don't worry about us - we are not policing you. So," he extended his hand to him, "Danny."

"Noah."

"Noah, I like that name. Where are you from?"

"Seattle. I moved here because my parents died, and my uncle took me in."

"Man, that sucks. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. My cousin's friends are trying to make me fit in and apparently I've been moping too much."

"Nothing wrong with moping, you just lost your family. But maybe they are trying to keep you from reclusing?"

"Yeah, maybe."

"Wanna sit with us for lunch? I promise none of my friends bite."

Allie was smiling at their conversation when they finally reached the door. 

"Oh, is Allison your cousin? I didn't know - why didn't you tell me, Allison? He's cute!"

"Danny, please. Come on, Noah, sit with us. It's either that or sitting with Greenberg."

"You don't want to sit with Greenberg."

Noah nodded. When they reached the cafeteria and sat down, everybody smiled, even Stiles, but nobody as big as Scott himself. 

Noah also noticed that everybody on the school were looking at them. Somehow he ended up sitting with the popular kids. That was new.


	7. Chapter 6

The first fugue state happened Thursday night. He broke it when his body slammed against the mountain ash barrier, but somehow remained animalistic, trying to get out, trying to rip someone apart. The wolf growled at Chris who had a tranq gun out, but calmed down when the man with the red eyes walked through the door, looking at him unwavering, like a rock in the middle of a storm. The wolf saw the authority of the alpha, and while a part of him wanted to attack him, to prove himself over him, it was a very small portion of it, and the rest just crouched back - not in fear, but in respect, waiting for the alpha to leave. 

He didn't. 

Everybody had their bitch face the following morning at school. 

Derek and Isaac had gone scouting on the woods, while the Sheriff had surreptitiously ordered a search in town of a wild dog. Allie and Uncle Chris had stayed to help Scott in case he tried to harm himself as an attempt to break the barrier. Lydia, Stiles and Danny scouted the internet for recent animal attacks, and had asked Deaton for any werewolf tracking spell. At the end of her shift Melissa had come to take a look over him, finally weakened down and back to human, while Scott, Allie and Stiles went to the Nemeton thing Stiles had mentioned because it acted as a beacon of the supernatural. 

He didn't understand. He had killed the alpha, and according to Derek, that was the only thing that could cause the fugue states on a newly turned werewolf. It was a very dark ritual, to force a newly bitten werewolf to kill with the alpha and bathe with the blood of the victim before the first full moon of his transformation happened. And it didn't even have to be a choice - the mere act of murder in front of him would be binding. Very few alphas resorted to that - mostly alphas that had lowered to the most basic, the wildest state of mind, hungry for power and willing to obtain it by ensnaring the members of their pack; and even very few werewolves were capable of resisting such a siren song. As a matter of fact, the records Deaton had obtained from other emissaries showed that only one person had been capable of such a feat, and was standing in front of him, red eyes earned with force of will instead of murder. 

That didn't mean that he was invincible. As a matter of fact, he was trying not to fall asleep in Econ, and Coach - everybody called him Coach, not Mr. Finstock - seemed to enjoy yelling at him, the looks of a man remembering old times. 

Thankfully the class ended and no one had to endure the torture for too long. 

"I'm sorry."

"Hey! Not your fault." Scott was eating his lunch by the mouthful. They all sat in the bleachers - it was sunny outside, and the breeze wasn't that cold. They were avoiding the crowds - sleep deprivation did have some effect on them, particularly Lydia who looked ready to destroy anyone who stood in her way. 

"Why did you all come? I mean, Allie and Uncle Chris, yeah - and Scott, since he's the alpha, but everyone?"

"We have a system?"

"A system?"

"After a particular incident where people died because of miscommunication, we made the oath never to keep anything to ourselves, and inform everyone as soon as possible. We do have tiers: if it requires a quick city scouting, we only call either the Sheriff or Derek, depending on who's at the station, and word it so we can get some police help. Obviously, we do it in a manner that if a human gets involved he'd call either of them immediately. If research is needed then Lydia, Stiles and I are contacted - usually Stiles if it's in the middle of the night, since we do care about our sleep schedules."

"Hey! You are teenagers, you are supposed to fuck up with your sleep schedules!"

"Fucking up with my sleep schedule during the week doesn't get me a date on the weekend Stiles. The guys at Jungle are _very_ picky. If the emergency is immediate - such as a rogue alpha - everybody is contacted and what happened last night is a good example." Danny took a bite from his muffin. "If the emergency is not that problematic, we wait until we have enough facts and build a plan for it."

"When do you call Scott directly?"

"They call me if it's an _Oh my God Oh my God we're gonna die_ emergency. Mom's orders."

"What?"

"Last year his grades dropped like lead because of the shenanigans. And Melissa didn't know. My dad didn't either, but I had the ADD as an excuse as to why would my grades not be the typical. Since she found out there were legitimate reasons and nothing she could to much about, she's been more understanding. That doesn't mean she won't try her best to keep distractions down to a need-to-know basis."  
Scott smiled, like he was embarrassed. "Besides, being the alpha kinda lets me know if something _is_ going on. Like you."

"Like me?"

"I just knew I had to go look you up. It was... odd. I knew there was a wolf in my territory that I needed to fend off. But when I found you, I knew I had to bring you down."

"Wait - you found me Thursday, right? I was turned Sunday going on Monday - four days running around? And I don't remember running away much, mostly running around in circles... I think, I don't know. I mean, that's what I think I remember."

"Hey, don't sweat it. We were in Oregon up at that point."

"Wait, you were? Why didn't you say that before?" Stiles almost spouted his food out. 

"I didn't think that was important? I mean, Derek and Isaac and I did discuss it when we were driving back."

"Besides, we thought it was obvious since we got home at four in the morning, Stiles."

"You could've had a super awesome battle and not tell us about it."

"Did you see anything in our clothes?"

"You two, stop it." Lydia snapped at them. "How far along into Oregon were you?"

"Here are the coordinates." Scott gave her his cellphone. "Oh, wow - that's almost 300 miles from here!"

"Scott, how big is your territory?" Noah asked.

"I don't know?" Scott frowned. "I asked Derek - he said that the Hale territory was a couple dozen square miles, a good portion mixed between the Shasta-Trinity and Mendocino, but we found you in Winema. And it still felt as _my_ territory, you know?"

"Are there any werewolves in the area?" Danny asked. "I mean, in Oregon?"

"Besides the ones we killed? I don't know - my family followed the code very strongly. It had to get out of control before we were around. If there were, mom would've been the one to know." He felt a rock in his stomach. He hadn't mentioned her since that night, holding out to the hope that she could still be alive. 

He knew she wasn't - Allie had told him they had buried the bodies after beheading them - but a part of him still wanted to believe they'd call saying they were alive. 

He hadn't noticed that Allie was now sitting next to him, her head on his shoulder, and that a leg of Scott's was touching his back. He had noticed the warm that had suddenly enveloped him, and he had to put a name to it. Pack. 

"So, in better news, Jungle tonight?" Danny hung his head at Stiles suggestion. 

"What is Jungle?"

"A bar. A gay bar."

"The only gay bar in a fifty mile radius."

"Really?"

"Small town. It's the only gay bar in the county. Third Friday of every month is underage night - they let kids sixteen and up go, so they get to meet everybody else, you know."

"Besides, Stiles has lots of friends there." Scott smiled at him and punched him in the arm.

"You coming, Scotty? Still want to see how many paid-for drinks you get?"

"No dude. Date night." Both Allison and Isaac blushed a little bit, "I believe is Isaac's turn to organize it."

"Why don't you come?" Danny asked Noah.

"Oh, no - I'll be alright, it's not like I have something to wear."

"Wait, Lydia, you didn't get him something to wear out at night?"

"Of course not. I needed an excuse to get him out again."

Noah blanched. Everybody else laughed at him. 

"Come on. I'll go with you this time. That way Lydia won't eat you alive."


	8. Chapter 7

"I'm still thinking we should've got the leather pants."

"No, Lydia. He's too skinny for them."

"Besides, I can't afford to spend 300 bucks on a pair of pants I will only use once."

Lydia harrumphed. They were back at Danny's - he said he needed to get changed before they got to Jungle - and they were choosing Noah's outfit. They had gone through three different combinations of the clothes they had bought (charged on Derek's card, though Noah swore to himself to repay him at some point in his life) and neither of them were satisfied. Honestly, Noah was just waiting for a moment in which he could run away. Not that he could, but still, small wishes, right?

Thirty minutes later he managed to convince them to go with the 'hot nerd' theme: red shirt, black vest and tie, dark jeans (too skinny according to him, good fit according to Lydia and Danny) and ankle boots. Lydia had applied some foundation to his face and was holding the pomade tub like a grenade.

"Don't move!"

"You're pulling my hair!"

"I should've gotten you the conditioner. Danny! Tell me you've got some dry conditioner on your bathroom!"

"I do but I'm still showering!"

"Figures. Don't move, Argent."

"Why are you here instead of helping up Allie? I thought you guys were best friends?"

"We are. And I'm here because she asked me to." Noah had closed his eyes to try and put himself in a mind palace and don't feel the pain of his hair being pulled, but opened them in frown when she said that. "She wants you to have fun, to break out a little of that shell that you have been building lately. Besides, we both saw the eyes you were making to Stiles the other day." Noah was sure his face was burning. "Oh, don't be a prude! Besides, that color does not go well with your shirt. Look up!" He did and could feel the eyeliner stabbing too close to his eyes. "Now close the eyes." He wasn't sure why he was obeying her, except for the fact that everybody feared her. "And now, look at the mirror."

He opened his eyes and looked at the guy in front of him. He looked, well, _nice_. His hair was ruffled and the eyeliner brought his eyes out, and the shirt and vest hugged him nicely, without being tight. He actually liked the way he looked, and a smile crept beneath his lips. 

"You're smiling! You're smiling! I need to take a picture." He actually let himself smile just a little longer, and Lydia showed him the result. The picture showed a teenager ready to go out for the night. 

He wondered if he could keep the charade a bit longer.

"Wow, Lyds, you are outdoing yourself." Danny was only wearing a towel and Noah had to admit, the boy was jacked. "Alright, you two out, I need to get _my_ outfit. Mom and Dad aren't home so you guys can whatever downstairs."

"Does it mean I can sex him up in your kitchen?"

"Please, Lydia, like you would ruin your own handiwork. There's some soda in the fridge - help yourselves!" Danny smiled as they both left the room, Lydia guiding him down the hallway. 

"So, Noah. What do you think of Stiles?"

"Why do all my conversations with you revolve around Stiles?"

"Because you like him. Or at least, find him attractive. Don't blush, it crashes the outfit!" Noah tried to breathe in deeply, like _that_ was going to help with the blush. "I mean, it's obvious you check him out, and you pay attention when he talks, and you are actually capable of keeping up with him."

"You can, too."

"Sweetie, I'm a genius. Nobody but Scott and I can keep up with him, and that's because Scott's got more than ten years of experience. You, on the other hand, seem to _follow_ him when he talks. Either you have the patience of a saint, or you have a crush on him." Lydia finished by giving him a glass of root beer, putting the bottle back in the fridge from where she had taken it out. Noah just hung his head down.

"Please tell me it's not obvious."

"It's obvious to everyone but Stiles. Why do you think Scott said they had a date? Poor Isaac must be scrambling it together - Scott did throw him under the bus with that."

"Wait, is that why you are not coming either?"

"Well, I do have to work on my paper on the density of dark matter, but yes, I am leaving you guys alone."

"So is this some sort of elaborate way to get the two of us alone? Why is Danny coming?"

"Because I am a regular on underage night, and I actually act as a gay protector for girls who end up attacked by straight guys who think that them being the only straight guys around would give them chances with the girls when, usually, they are there to hit on other girls. Besides, Stiles would've chickened out if only you had shown up." Danny had showed up with a pair of leather pants, a dark button up and boots. Noah wasn't sure all black worked on him but it was true that he did have the assets to fill the outfit. "Giving him the 411 on Stiles' crush?"

"More like giving him the 411 on his own crush on Stiles." Lydia answered. "You are not backing out, are you?"

"I... Why are you doing this?"

"Because we know. We know how hard it is to feel normal after something like that." Lydia's eyes went to his torso. He didn't want to ask how she knew where the scars should've been, had he not healed properly. "We know what it's like to feel your world crashing all around you, with no other option but death. We want to show you that just because you were bitten, it does not mean you are done. OK, it may or may not be the best strategy, but we are not going to leave you alone at the Argent's where you'd have access to thirteen different ways to off yourself."

"I already told Uncle Chris, I will finish high school."

"Yeah. That doesn't mean you'll follow through it." Noah frowned at Lydia. Had she seen something, as a banshee? "Minds are finicky, particularly a werewolf's. The emotions run high, and sometimes you lose control. Sometimes the darkest of your thoughts are the ones forefront and they end up being acted upon." Noah understood what she was saying. If he kept thinking about killing himself, he would do it if the thought ran through. 

"Lydia, you making out with Scott in order to make Jackson jealous is barely something that could be considered 'dark'".

"It was for Scott!"

"Anyways, Noah, the other reason we are doing this is because you seem like a nice guy, and we want Stiles to have a date. Hopefully he'll stop flying around like a drunken seagull and finally settle with someone, and maybe that someone is you, and maybe hopefully he'll not be a virgin anymore and we won't have to worry about him being a sacrifice." At the color Noah was turning, Danny just sighed. "You are also a virgin. Go figures."

"Danny, just... just do your magic. You are, after all, everybody's gay experience."

"Lydia, please, don't. I was trying to give him a picture of propriety."

"Danny, you took me shopping. I don't think I could've held you in propriety after all the suggestions you gave me this afternoon." Both Lydia and Danny laughed at his comment, and after a beat, Noah started chuckling too. 

He was actually liking these people. They were nice to him, and unlike what he thought at the beginning, they did not walk around him like he was about to set on fire. They were just teenagers, just like him. And more importantly, they were like _him_.

"Come on. Lydia, you are already looking fabulous if you want to come."

"You know what, I'll come. Besides, I need to say hi to Sarah and Mimi."

"Who?"

Sarah and Mimi were a trans girl and a drag queen Lydia knew because of Stiles. How he met them was a mystery, but they were among the people who showed up at Lydia's birthday party last year, where something dark and horrible had happened and Stiles had talked about it but actually didn't say much, just that a creeper called Peter had been responsible. Also some dude named Matt had been involved. But Sarah and Mimi had had nothing to do with that - Stiles had invited them to the party, and they had had a lot of fun until the cops showed up. They had to scram, since they were among the oldest people at the party which would've made them liable - alcohol was flowing that night. 

Sarah and Mimi were also very polite, charming, and had eyes that felt like X-Rays machines going through his body. 

Specially after Stiles showed up and he had to shut up to look at him. And somehow Stiles stopped talking when he saw him. 

"Uh... hi."

"Hi..."

"Didn't I tell you? Sarah, Mimi, let us leave these two lovebirds alone." Danny had disappeared as soon as they had arrived, and they could see him dancing with a guy in the middle of the floor. Lydia and her friends walked away, leaving the two of them standing awkwardly next to the table they were occupying. 

"Hi..."

"Hi. I already said that. Oh my god I'm babbling."

"Stiles, your modus operandi is babbling. And right now you are not babbling. I think. Oh god, I'm the one who's babbling."

"No - you're fine. You are totally fine. You are _totally_ fine. Oh god I suck at this."

"Anything else you suck?" The bad joke was worth Stiles' facial expression. "Come on. We are at a club. We can dance. Do you dance?"

"I flail. I promise I won't hurt you. On purpose. Pinkie promise."

Noah smiled and that shut Stiles up, since he also smiled. Daring a little, Noah grabbed him by the wrist and took him to the center of the floor, where they both let themselves loose to the beats of the music. It wasn't exactly Noah's style, but from the way Stiles was moving it was obviously _not_ his scene either. 

They kept at it, and slowly they kept coming together. Closer. At one point it was the two of them grinding against each other, and Noah could feel himself intoxicated in the petrichor that emanated from the skinny boy in front of him. Next to him. 

Kissing him. 

"Wow, that's hot."

He could hear the douchebag that had said that. As a matter of fact, he could smell him - it was one of those gym bunnies, one of those men that prided themselves in taking so much care of their bodies they looked artificial, like plastic mannequins in a mall. And this one reeked of lust and desire and alcohol and something else that Noah didn't like. And that he didn't want near Stiles. 

"Noah?"

"That dude. He's looking at us. He's looking at you."

"So? Does that make you uncomfortable?"

"It's not right..."

"Huh?" Stiles looked at the man and then back at him. "He seems normal. But I don't have magic eyes or anything. Do you want to get out?"

"No. I... I'm liking this. Are you liking this?"

"I'm loving this."

"Then forget I said anything."

They kept dancing, but the guy kept looking at them, circling them, and Noah could feel the wolf inside him rise to the challenge. And it did, when the guy found himself grinding the back of Stiles with the same intensity Noah was grinding Stiles' front.

"Hey, back off!" And maybe Noah didn't know his strength, the little shove he used on the guy sending him down onto the floor and attracting everyone's attention. Lydia and Danny were with them immediately, and Stiles had managed to get him to lower his head, hiding the gold in his eyes. 

"Noah, come on, let's get out of here."

"That was _super hot_!" The dude, whose smell was driving Noah crazy, just laughed at them leaving. Lydia barely said farewell to the girls and Danny had abandoned his catch of the night for them and Noah wanted to feel guilty about it, but all he could feel was the rage of having his territory attacked, having his presence insulted and his wolf challenged. He wanted to go back inside and attack but he could hear Stiles and Lydia and Danny and a portion of him - the human? The wolf? - knew he had to follow them. 

"We need to get a wolf here - Stiles, call Derek."

"On it, Lyds."

"Noah, come on, it was just another dude dancing. You are fine." Danny was the one trying to hold him - the human in him knew it was because he was the strongest of the three humans, the wolf sneered at the pathetic creature trying to control him. "We'll just go home and call it a night, alright? Noah?"

But Noah wasn't listening anymore. In the background, he could hear it - a call to arms, an order to rip and maul and kill and attack. 

"Guys, do you hear that?" Lydia spoke. "It's a howl - and it's not one of ours."

"What?"

And so he attacked.


	9. Chapter 8

"Noah!"

The werewolf pushed the human away and lunged to attack the skinny boy, but he jumped sideways and the werewolf almost crashed into the wall behind him. 

"Noah, I'm sorry, this is gonna hurt. Stiles, Danny, ears!" The werewolf turned to the petite girl and started towards her, but she opened her mouth and the most horrible shrill sound came out of it. It was puncturing its ears so hard it had to put its paws around its ears and howl in an attempt to drown it. 

It couldn't. 

It was so loud for a moment the werewolf stopped thinking, and Noah was able to push it down. He still couldn't do anything but cover his ears, and for a moment he thought he was going to bleed out of his ear canals. 

Thankfully, Lydia stopped. 

"What the hell was that?"

"That, Noah, was a banshee." Stiles and Danny had gotten up and were circling him. Before Noah could realize what they were doing a blue flash circled him and he realized he was trapped by mountain ash. 

Again. 

"I'm sorry - I don't -"

Stiles raised his hand while putting the cell phone on his ear. A beat later he could hear Derek's voice on the other side. 

"What?"

"We need your help. Noah went wild."

"Did he hurt you? Are you guys OK? Is he OK?"

"Yeah, we are fine, we have him in rowan right now. Derek, Lydia says she heard a howl - another wolf."

"Let me get there. Text Scott - tell him to wait for us at the house."

"Guys, I'm sorry, I don't know what got on me -" Noah started babbling as soon as Stiles hung up. He could see - hell, he could _smell_ the blood coming from Danny's forehead, and Lydia's attempt to remove it with some napkin she had from inside the club. Stiles just shook his head.

"It's alright, Noah. You were not in control. It's happened to all of us, at some point everybody has tried to kill everybody else."

"Not me!"

"Jackson tried to kill you!"

"Whatever." Danny just glared at Stiles. Noah wanted to keep apologizing, but a sweet smell distracted him, making the wolf angry again. 

"Noah?"

The door of the club opened, and stumbling came out the guy that looked a bit too perfect for Noah's liking.

"Woohoo, I didn't know you guys had a party out here! And it's the pretty boys! My, did I interrupt a blow job?" Noah started growling at him while standing up, ready to hit him if necessary. "Ah, I'm getting you riled up, aren't I? Who is a good boy?" 

Suddenly a vial exploded in his face, covering him with a white powder that made his skin sizzle. Even inside the rowan circle Noah could feel the waves of heat that came from the wounds growing in his face.

"Bitch! What the fuck?"

"That's mistletoe, which tells me that you are not human. What are you?"

"Fuck off! I was not harming anyone, you have no right to attack?"

"And yet you reacted. What are you?"

"Like fuck I'm telling you."

"Either present yourself, or leave," Derek's voice came from the shadows further down the alley, eyes blue and broad shoulders. 

"Fine. Fuck off. Stupid grove singing so sweetly." He kept mumbling something about being attracted to energy, but he was walking away so fast Noah stopped paying attention. 

"Noah?"

"Yes, Derek?"

"What happened?"

"I - I don't know. I was dancing with Stiles, and then I got angry because that dude was hitting on him, but then we were outside and I heard a howl and suddenly I felt like I had to attack everybody. As soon as Lydia screamed I stopped - like the sound was drowned or something."

"You heard a howl?"

"I heard it, too." Lydia immediately countered. "It was loud, and it was not one I know."

"I didn't hear anything. OK, we need to discuss this with the pack - Noah, we are going to remove the rowan circle, but I'll need you to let me handle you. Is that OK?"

"Are you going to knock me out?"

"No - I'll grab you by the nape. Is that OK?"

Noah swallowed, and nodded. Danny and Derek approached him and the first destroyed the circle, while the second quickly put his hand on his back. He felt subdued, like the simple fact that Derek was holding him in that position meant he was in a lower rank of the pack.

But then again, he wasn't even sure he was part of the pack. 

By the time they got back to the McCall house, Noah had thought of three ways to kill himself. He didn't want to be a danger to those who had finally accepted him. 

"Stop doing that."

"Stop doing what?"

"Thinking about ways to die."

Noah didn't say anything. He didn't even dare to look Derek in the eye. 

Stiles, and Lydia were in the living room with everybody else. After a small nod from Derek, Melissa got up from where she was treating Danny and started fussing about him. 

"Please, Melissa, I'm fine."

"Shut up and let me look at you." He still felt compelled by her voice, and let her go through his eyes, his teeth, and his hands. "He's fine - if he was hurt he already healed."

"I - no, Lydia stopped me." Allison looked proudly at her best friend, who just looked at the floor in response. 

It wasn't a look that suited her much. Noah pictured her being the proud girl who always got straight A's. 

"OK, Noah. From the beginning, what happened?" Scott had his serious face on, and Noah answered. Lydia and Stiles also told their story, which matched perfectly, while Melissa finished touching up Danny. "So, you and Lydia were the only ones to hear the howl." Both of them nodded. "Alright. What do we know of ghost werewolves?"

"What?" Noah was sure he sounded incredulous, but apparently he was the only one.

"I can't recall any stories from my family. Werewolves don't tend to stay as ghosts, usually having lives fully."

"I can check the bestiary, but I don't remember anything similar." Uncle Chris said. 

"And I can't remember any folklore - wait, there was a Scooby Doo episode!" Stiles flailed.

"Stiles, we need to take this seriously." Stiles looked somberly at his father. 

"Wait, back up - ghost werewolves?"

"Noah, I'm a banshee. I hear the dead. If I heard the howling while no one else did, it's safe to assume that the howls came from a dead werewolf."

"Probably your alpha." Derek continued.

"But I thought I was an omega? Omegas don't have alphas!"

"Sometimes they do. Remember that sometimes there are omegas in packs. Besides, you still haven't had your first full moon, if it's a ghost it may be trying to use its pull on you to create a regeneration spell."

"I thought you needed the Worm Moon for that?" Stiles asked Derek.

"Honestly, I don't know. And I am not coming close to Peter."

"Guys!" Scott's voice had a different inflection this time and Noah felt compelled to just _look_ at him. It was the alpha talking, and they all needed to listen. "It's late, we are tired, we need to think this through. Stiles, Lydia - ghost werewolves. Tomorrow I'll check with Deaton. Derek, if needed be we'll go to Peter, both you and I. For now, let's go to bed. Agreed?"

Everybody mumbled in agreements and started going upstairs, like they all were going to sleep there. Noah looked quizzically at his uncle, who suddenly realized he didn't know what was going on. 

"In nights like this we tend to sleep all in this house. A pack thing."

"Oh, yeah! Sorry - we all sleep in a pile, except for mom and dad and Mr. Argent - they have their beds. Come on, you are more than welcome to join us!" Scott smiled at him, and as tempting as it was, Noah shook his head. Uncle Chris immediately went with him. 

"You know what, Scott, I think I'll skip tonight. Allison, you call me in the morning if you need anything."

Scott looked like a kicked puppy, but didn't say anything. Neither did Uncle Chris, he just guided him to his SUV. 

"I'm sorry."

They were already halfway back, and Noah could feel the uneasiness coming from his Uncle. 

"What for?"

"Making you not stay with the Pack."

"It's alright. You are family."

"What's it like, being a human in a werewolf pack?"

"It's definitely something. I feel like I can trust them with my life, even if I don't like all of them. I feel safe, I feel protected. I also feel like I need to keep my eye on my daughter since she's dating two guys at the same time, but I know I can trust her so I keep my distance." He chuckled at the comment, like he was trying to distance himself from a patriarchal form of parenthood. "I like it. It's a bit more like family, and it makes me feel more in comfort with the fact that your Aunt Victoria died."

"How did she die?"

"Derek bit her. She honored the tradition and killed herself."

"Did you... try to convince her to stay?"

"No. I was weak, and I let myself be convinced by your grandfather that she was gone. She accepted it as well, and put a knife through her heart." He finished parking the car and looked at him. "It's something I'll regret for the rest of my life, not understanding that every single creature is different. Even werewolves."

Noah nodded and walked towards their apartment. He waited until his Uncle sealed his room with rowan and cried into the pillow - that still smelled like Scott. 

When he woke up in the morning, the circle was broken and a note was on the fridge, saying that his Uncle had gone to discuss some things with the pack. He was more than welcome to join them - he had even left directions. 

Instead, he decided to walk away. He needed to clear his head, to try and think how was he controlled by a disembodied howl. He ended up in a small diner - Minnie's, according to the huge sign above - and ordered a coffee. The pretty girl who was in charge of his table smiled at him a bit too coyly, but he didn't have the heart to tell her he was gay. 

He just closed his eyes. He wanted to hear the howl again. He wanted to tell the pack that he had found something, anything, to make up for the fact that he almost killed two members of it. 

He ended up scrunching his nose - a sweetly sick smell invaded the diner. And his booth. 

"You look much more handsome without the make up, dude, though your hair definitely needs some styling." Noah opened his eyes to find Mr. Perfect sitting across him, giant sunglasses covering his eyes, faint traces of third degree burns slowly disappearing from his face. The girl from before had approached them again, now a bit more nervous, like she was afraid of interrupting. "Oh, hi. Please bring me the greasiest plate you guys offer, a chocolate milkshake and a glass of milk. And bring my boyfriend another coffee. He was DD last night, and he had to take care of me. As you can imagine, that means he didn't sleep much." The girl nodded and left, and Noah could hear the disappointment in her heartbeat. "So, what's up?"

"I'm not your boyfriend."

"I know that, but she was going to keep asking for your number and I can tell you want the d, not the v. I'm Abraham."

He extended his hand, and Noah eyed it warily.

"Come on, I'm buying you coffee, and your friend burned my face last night. At least be polite."

"Noah." He barely shook it - unlike the way his father had taught him. 

"Nice to meet you, Noah. Now, could you tell me what the fuck happened last night? I was having a nice dinner last night until you caught me, and then you went batshit crazy? It wasn't me - I didn't use any of my powers on you."

Noah tilted his head, analyzing what he had just said. 

"You are a succubus."

"Isn't it obvious? I know what I smell like to a werewolf - like the waste disposal of a licorice factory." Noah just raised his eyebrows - he'd never been to a licorice factory before. "What? Are you a newbie?"

"A little over a week."

"Haven't even had your full moon yet, huh? Explains a bit what happened last night - I was probably intoxicating and riled up the instinct to defend your boyfriend." The girl brought his breakfast in that moment, and he turned to her. "Harley, darling, the guy on table four? He's thinking of asking you out and if you say no he's gonna get in a fritz because of his fedora. If I were you I'd switch tables with another server, preferably a guy." She opened her eyes like saucers but nodded and went back to the back of the kitchen. Noah didn't say anything, but he was sure his face was communicating what was going through his mind. "What? I don't like assholes."

"I thought you fed on sexual thoughts and desires?"

"Sexual energy. That guy? He just wants his ego stroked. It would be like eating shit. You sure you don't want anything?" Noah shook his head. "So, what's up? Where's pretty moles?"

"He's not my boyfriend."

"Are you sure about that? You got pretty jealous last night."

"I almost killed him."

"Did I rile you up that much?" Noah shook his head again. Abraham whistled. "Good, I just got here, the energy from whatever is in the woods that keeps calling me is fantastic, and I don't want to get in trouble before I introduce myself to the guardians of this town. Have you?"

"I don't know who they are..."

"Well, if you are a baby werewolf they probably have you followed. The rumor is that this town is guarded by a True Alpha. Haven't seen one of those in a long time."

"Wait, a true alpha?"

"Capital, my boy. A True Alpha."

"I know who that is."

"So they keep you on a leash."

"He found me. When I was bitten. I was going feral."

"A threat to the territory. Were you bitten nearby?"

"Oregon."

"Fuck. That means he's powerful. Would make sense, with the rumours I heard about him."

"What rumours?"

"That he went inside the mind of a demon just to retrieve his best friend. That shit is crazy, yo."

Noah wondered about the logistics of that, and what demon. Maybe it was the whole kitsunesuki phase Stiles kept talking about.

"Aren't you afraid, then? Incubi are demons."

"Yeah, but I don't kill. These past couple centuries I've never had to, with all the emotions on the sleeves. Last night was an example - I was having my fill. You and your boyfriend, you tasted so good. So new."

"He's not - "

"Yeah, yeah, you said it. That's why I said 'new'. Oh, shit, I didn't ruin your first date, did I? Fuck, I hate when I do that. I'm sorry." Noah couldn't believe the guy. According to his family bestiary, incubi and succubi were ravagers, willing to introduce themselves into people's dreams and fantasies to feed of their sexual energy. The guy in front of him looked pretty much like him - if he were actually handsome - and seemed to have a good policy on what to do regarding his impulses. 

Maybe what Scott, Stiles and all of them kept telling him was true. There was a chance for a creature like him. 

If he resolved what had caused him to go feral the previous night. 

"What?"

"Sorry. I'm having a lot of my prejudices and stereotypes crushed with a sledgehammer."

"Ah, that." Abraham shrugged. "You're a werewolf now, the first step in the program is to accept it." He finished his milkshake with a slurp, and eructed - completely destroying the picture of perfection he seemed to possess. "So, can you introduce me to the True Alpha?"


	10. Chapter IX

“Oh wow”

Noah had just announced Abraham to the group, but the incubus had not taken his eyes from Scott, ever since they approached the McCall house. It was almost as if he was bound to look at him, or towards him, or in his general direction.

“Er - sorry. Abraham. No last name. Well, right now I’m using Emerson, so Abraham Emerson. Wow, I mean - wow.”

“Dude, what’s wrong with you?” Stiles asked. Immediately his father smacked him in the back of his head.

“Nothing? Well - not really, but I’m OK. I think.”

Abraham didn’t look OK. Noah could see a thin layer of sweat forming on his forehead, and a strange scent coming off from him, that seemed to enhance the sweet smell he already exuded.

“Well, Abraham Emerson, what are your intentions here?” Scott was keeping his voice leveled, but Noah noticed that he was scrunching his nose too. Isaac and Derek as well. Danny was also looking at the incubus with a frown, and both Lydia and Allison seemed to be noticing something no one else did.

“Just to live, really. I mean, I can hear the song the Nemeton murmurs, and its power - I don’t want it for myself, too much shit to get into, but just being here feels right, you know? Like, calm. Peaceful. Must be the guardians.” Abraham smiled, like he was trying to be charming but coming off as nervous. “I do not intend to do harm, to hunt or to kill. I was just telling Noah this morning that it’s been centuries since I've lost control during my feeds - I usually need to go to a club once a week and that, complemented with mortal food, keeps me healthy and in check. No one in the club notices if it’s a good audience, just taking a little bit here and there, increasing the desire for the ones they already desire rather than redirecting it to me.”

He kept looking at Scott, and the sweetness of his scent kept getting worse. Lydia and Allison started having a whispered conversation, so low Noah couldn't catch anything from it, but it seemed that Scott and Isaac and Derek did, since the alpha turned an interesting shade of pink.

“If that’s the case,” Stiles interrupted, “can you explain what happened last night?”

“Sure. You two were having your first date. You two were really hot for each other. I wanted some of it, it’s very sweet, you get me? Wolfie here smelled me and decided to protect you. Simple as that.”

“What about the howl Noah heard?” Stiles pressed.

“What howl?”

Scott looked at Noah, who just shook his head. Scott nodded his.

“If you mean no harm to us, to my pack or to my family, and to the people of Beacon Hills, I welcome you to the lands, Abraham Emerson. Be assured that as long as we remain in good standing you can roam safely.”

“Thank you. And sorry for being so blunt, but is there a bathroom I can use, like, right now?”

Noah was amazed at the way Scott’s faced switched from regal and warlike to a young man concerned about a guest in his house. Shy, even.

“Sure? Over there, second door on the right.”

“Thank you.” Abraham went running into said door, and everybody looked curiously, except for the girls who started sniggering. A couple seconds later, the scents coming from the bathroom were really, really strong and Noah actually blushed. With all the other werewolves.

Stiles looked clueless.

“Guys, what’s going on?”

“Is he doing what I think he’s doing?” Melissa asked, an eyebrow raised to her son.

“I think?” Scott answered.

“What is he doing?” Stiles asked again.

“He’s relieving himself.” Derek answered, surly.

“Well, yeah, that’s what you do in a bathroom…”

“Sexually.” Isaac supplied. Stiles turned to the door so fast he almost got whiplash.

“Really? Why?”

Nobody answered him. Noah had a suspicion but he was not sure. They all heard the flush, then the faucet go off, and if Noah was not mistaken, some serious scrubbing going on.

A second later Abraham came out and closed the door. He looked at them and paled.

“This is embarrassing.”

“We are not talking about it. Er, Abraham, if you have nothing else?” Scott said before anyone else could answer him.

“No, thanks, I think I should step out. Noah?”

Noah turned to him questioningly, but didn’t say anything. Stiles actually motioned for him to go after the demon, so he did.

“Why didn’t you tell me he was that hot? I had to -”

“We all know you just wanked in there, and quite pitifully since it took you less than five minutes. Please tell me you used toilet paper and flushed it - I’m the one who introduced you, so your actions reflect on me.”

“Har har, you're so cute suffering second hand embarrassment. A warning would’ve sufficed! He just hit me!”

“I didn’t know? I mean, to me he smells like werewolf? And yeah, the kid’s definitely hot but in case you didn’t notice, I’m not exactly looking for the hot factor everywhere I walk.” Abraham cocked his head accusing him of lying. “Besides, I like Stiles better,” Noah mumbled.

“Still, I thought we were friends!” Noah raised his eyebrow. “OK, fine, not friends, but at least we were pleasant acquaintances during our coffee session. You should’ve warned me he’s fucking smoking!”

“Are you sure you are not just drunk on his power? I mean, he does smell real good -”

“I wanted to jump his bones right there, in front of his mother! Do you have any idea how hot that is?”

“Ew, no?”

“Prude. Next time you encounter a hottie, let me know before introducing me to him, alright?”

“Fine!”

“Good. What are you doing later?”

“Er, helping them finding out what happened to me?”

“That’s what you are doing now - dude, it’s Saturday. We’re hanging out.”

“Why?”

“Because in case you didn’t notice, I look like a hormonal teenager so it’s best if I hang out with hormonal teenagers. Bring your beau, bring your pack.”

“They are not my pack.”

“Because you don’t want them to be. Cellphone.” Abraham motioned at Noah’s pocket and he reluctantly got his phone out. Abraham quickly tapped his number and took a selfie for the contact list. “I’ll call you later tonight, I’m in the mood of hanging out in the mall. Have fun investigating!” He started walking away and Noah just looked at him bewildered. He was definitely not someone he would’ve hanged out with before the bite, and he wasn’t still sure he wanted to hang out with him now, but he didn’t know how to reject him.

Shrugging, he just walked back into the McCalls, where Lydia and Allison were making fun of the fact that Abraham had done the deed after minutes of just meeting Scott. The poor alpha was as red as his eyes, and even his mother couldn’t help but smirk a little.

“Did he explain himself?” Scott asked Noah, a bit shyly.

“You’re too hot to walk this Earth according to him.” Isaac and Stiles punched the air at the same time, Lydia smirked self congratulatory and Scott just hid his head in his arms.

“Why?”

“He said it was that you just looked hot, but I think he was blinded by your power. He was telling me the rumors about you were too big and too spread. Apparently you retrieved your best friend from inside a demon?”

“Not just that - this body? Fucking new. I mean, I still have the scars the other body had, but this has only been a few months running.” Stiles looked really proud, while Scott wanted to disappear into the ground.

“How?”

“No idea. Scott wanted to free me from the other guy, and Scott did. With Lydia’s help, of course.” Lydia made an impatient motion with her hand, like it had been nothing - but Noah noticed that the mood in the room had shifted slightly.

It had been something, then.

“Anything on the howl?” Noah cleared his throat and asked.

“Not much. We know there’s no record of werewolf ghosts, so it’s either a new thing - like usual for us - or something else. If it’s something else, then the possibilities open up a bit: a witch, voodoo, spirit channelers…”

“I’m still not sure I believe mediums are a thing,” Danny shook his head. Lydia looked at him reproachfully.

“Technically I am a medium, Danny.”

“But you are more than human. They are just dudes who happen to see ghosts.”

“You mean like the child from that movie? You know - I see dead people?” Noah asked. His family had never mentioned anything like that - their dominion was creatures, not humans.

He was not human anymore.

"Hey, cheer up," Stiles was looking at him. "I don't think anyone under the age of eighteen is human in this house."

"Hey!" Danny yelped.

"Come on, Danny, you've survived everything this town has done to us. And your last name is Mahealani. I'm still waiting to see what you are."

"That's frankly insulting."

"No, it's not."

"Guys, cut it out!" Melissa's voice boomed around the house and everybody obeyed her. "Alright, I'm off to my shift at the hospital. If anything happens I'll call you, alright?"

"Yes, mom."

"Bye, Mrs. McCall!" Everybody chorused and the woman left. The Sheriff left a couple of minutes after and Noah realized the only parental supervision was his uncle.

"Alright, so - witches."

"Why witches?"

"We start with the most common, and we move onwards to the most difficult. Witches. Have you dealt with witches before, Chris?"

"Not that I can think of. They are usually focused on small benefits, and they definitely don't go in killing sprees. If they do, other witches take care of it, so we seldom have to intervene."

"Do werewolves not have a similar power structure?" Isaac asked him.

"Well, yes. It's just that hunters don't trust it.'

Noah remembered one take out dinner with his dad, a couple of years ago, when he asked him why werewolves weren't incapable to keep themselves from hunting humans. His father had said that all werewolves, by virtue of the bite, were rabid animals, and had to be put down. Not even those who lived within society could escape the thrill of the full moon, and blue eyes had to be slain.

Suddenly he felt the urge to take out his phone and turn on the camera. He could see the eyes there, gold.

A hand on his shoulder and an arm on his back informed him that Stiles had seen his behavior.

"Going on any killing sprees without telling us?" It was a joke, and Noah did smile, but it still stung a little.

"I just remembered our code."

"Nous chassons ceux qui nous chassent?" Allison asked him. He nodded, and she sighed. "Dad, didn't we send an email with the new code?"

"Nous protegeons ceux que ne peut pas se proteger eux memes." Noah recited from memory. "I got the email - my whole family did. There was a conversation about how youngsters didn't understand the ways of the world, and most of them deleted it."

"Oh goddamnit."

"We'll have to wait until the next family meeting. When is it, dad?"

"Still a couple of years. You are the Argent matriarch, even if they don't want to recognize it. You are the oldest female Argent from the Gevaudan line alive."

"No need to remind me."

They kept at it. At some point they called the local veterinary - apparently he was a druid who had a lot of knowledge on werewolves - and they devised some sort of strategy to try and receive the broadcast of the howl in case it happened again. Honestly, Noah couldn't pay much attention - he kept distracted by the way Stiles moved, trying to occupate all the space available with his limbs, his moles moving up and down with his mouth that seemed to encase too many words for its size.

"Is that good?"

"Yeah, yeah, that's fine." Noah had no idea what he had just agreed to, but the way Stiles smiled assured him it would be alright.

"Alright kiddos, it seems we have a plan. Now, what are we gonna do with ourselves until we spring it up?" Lydia asked the room. As if answering her, Noah's cellphone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hey Noah! So how's the research coming?"

"Not bad - we have a plan." He mouthed Abraham to the room, causing the immediate embarrassment of Scott and the delight of everyone else.

"Good! Have the afternoon free? Wanna come to the mall? There's this band playing at some point - some tween pop rock stuff that people four years younger than you adore, but the ambience seem to be pretty good."

"Let me see. Hey guys," he asked the room, "wanna go hang out with Abraham at the mall?"

Scott turned red and said no. Everybody else said yes.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case this doesn't make it obvious, I subscribe to the "Everybody wants Scott's d" club.


	11. Chapter X

“Alright, are we having fun?” Noah asked.

They were hanging out in the mall. There was a band, yes, but their music wasn’t exactly good - though Abraham had grabbed Allison and Lydia and started dancing with them, earning quite a glare from Scott, Isaac and Stiles - while all the other boys remained on the back. Stiles did start humming at one of the songs, and when Noah raised his eyebrow at him he just mouthed what, looking like a deer in the headlights.

“I don’t know, are you?” Scott seemed like he was enjoying himself, but then again Noah hadn’t seen anything yet that had actually set off the alpha. Noah shrugged, but Danny denied vehemently and demanded to go to the food court and get some food. The five of them signaled the other three and walked away.

Noah also noticed how Scott pushed Stiles towards him. He didn’t complain - he actually offered his hand, and Noah complied. It felt good in his hand anyways.

“So, Noah! You said you do mathematical simulations? What’s the system you use for that?” Danny asked him. Noah started talking shop about computers - he wanted to get a Haswell i7 since he was getting good results on the wolfsbane distribution model, and Danny started asking about comparisons. It turned out Danny knew computers but not modelling, while Noah knew modelling but usually just bought what the guy at Best Buy told him. Scott and Stiles just listened to their banter while it was obvious Isaac was playing footsie with Scott. And then he had to blush because Stiles started playing footsie with him. Danny understood he was the fifth wheel and went to get milkshakes for everybody.

“Hey…”

“Hey…”

“So, what do you think of Beacon Hills now?”

“I don’t know. It’s growing on me. People are nice.”

“That’s because you haven’t seen him bitching.” Isaac interrupted them, while Scott was nibbling at his ear. “He’s fooling you into thinking he’s a nice guy.”

“Isaac Lahey, I find your comments insulting. Just because I ruined your scarf collection doesn’t mean I’m a bad guy.”

“You ruined his scarf collection? How many did you have?”

“Seventeen. He’s still paying for them.”

“What did you do?”

“Corn syrup.”

Noah snickered at the thought of a drawer full of scarves and corn syrup. Isaac glared at him but it seemed more good natured than something else. Besides, Allison had just sat down opposite of Scott and was very intent on catching up.

“Oh la la, you guys look delicious.” Abraham stole Noah’s milkshake and drank from the straw. Noah made a movement after it but Stiles grabbed him to keep him seated and it only resulted in Danny’s milkshake being almost knocked out, if it weren’t because he managed to get it out of the way. Lydia just snorted at them while Abraham just winked and sat propping his feet up in the table.

“Damn, this town is just so alive. I’m satiated just by seeing you guys. Damn. No, I am!” He answered everybody’s questioning looks, “it was definitely a good decision to come here.”

“OK, question time - how can you feed without having sex? I thought the myth was you had sex with a guy first, took his sperm, then had sex with a girl and impregnated her?”

“Pfft, that’s what the catholics want you to think. I feed on the raw emotion. Lust is like a power bar, or a muffin - it’ll give me a boost, but I’ll be hungry five minutes later. Passion is like a smoothie, or lunch - it’ll satiate me for a while, and I can go on and hide among mortals until I need to feed again. Love? Now love is the best. When someone falls in love with an incubus or a succubus, they can sustain them for a long time. I was married a couple of times, to keep pretense.”

“That doesn’t sound so bad.”

“I’m still a demon, Noah. I can’t love anyone back. At least, not in that sense - have you guys heard of aromantic people? I’m basically one of those, which sucks because of course society will use me as an example in order to demonize them, when for them it’s just a matter of wiring. It’s who they are, period.” Lydia tilted his head and he raised his hands. “What? I’ve lived with humanity for so long, of course I’ve picked up some morals.” He looked wistful for the first time, and sagged his shoulders as a different smell - melancholy - came off him. “I don’t know - I made my relationship with Anna work, but it was because she gave herself way too much. Everything she did, it was with such force it was impossible not to admire her, respect her. But I didn’t love her. It is torture for the one who falls for me. Jack on the other hand, poor kid, it drove him to suicide. Hey - I did try to stop him! It’s just… that’s how I work.”

“And now?”

“Well, with the Malthusian explosion it became quite easy to just feed on lust, maybe a little passion every once in a while. I can just disappear, be a blip in someone’s head for a little while, like one of those missed connections on craigslist, you know - it keeps me alive, sane, well, I can even use most of my powers. I have sex sometimes if I’m feeling particularly down, or if I have someone in mind… Which reminds me, I haven’t done it with a True Alpha,” he wiggled his eyebrows to the threesome and Isaac and Allison looked like murder, while Scott looked like he was burning from the inside, “or a banshee,” he said, turning to Lydia.

“What - do you want to find out if I scream in bed? Are you sure?” Lydia’s tone was sweet, which from everybody’s faces seemed to be something dangerous.

“Oh, come on! Fine, I’ll stop with the lewdness. It’s not like I didn’t have my feel just looking at you three all PDA. Or you two. So, having fun?”

The show was in an intermission, and apparently they were having a karaoke constest at the moment.

“The music sucks, dude.”

“You were singing it, Stiles. What’s your real name anyways?”

“It’s Polish.”

“I lived in Poland in the 1850’s. Bad idea - nobody wanted to have sex.”

“I’m still not telling you.”

“Asshole.” Abraham laughed at Stiles, but then stopped suddenly. “My god.” With a little faster than human speed he cupped Stiles’ face. Noah and Scott jumped but reluctantly saw that Abraham was just inspecting him. “What happened to you?”

“What do you mean?”

“Your soul. It’s marred.”

“Hey!” Scott now sounded furious while Stiles recoiled - Noah opened his arms to receive him, but Stiles still reached for Scott with his free arm.

“Sorry! I’m - it’s just - I mean, the stitching is beautiful, a work of art, but it’s there. It shone when you laughed. I’m sorry, I’m insulting you - me and my mouth…”

“What do you mean, stitching?” Lydia asked, her head cool among them.

“You are a banshee, you should be able to see it, too. His soul, it’s all patched up.”

“I know. I do see it - I thought I was imagining things.”

“What? Are you saying that I’m incomplete?”

“No - the soul is whole. It’s just patched up.”

“Lydia, what do you mean you’ve been seeing this for a while?” Scott asked the redhead, in a voice Noah had heard just a couple of times - the alpha voice.  
“Ever since you know, we rescued him from the nogitsune. I thought I was hallucinating but then the stitches just faded. Now I only see him when he laughs, particularly when he laughs with you.”

“Wait, so you didn’t know you were patched up? OK - that’s impossible, the work is too good, only a great witch could’ve done that.”

“We don’t even know what you’re talking about, ass,” Stiles was coming out of the shell he had coiled into, and was now on a roll, “and what do you think, that you can go around telling people their souls are shit? Guess that’s why you can’t love anyone, is it?”

“Wait, shit? I’m complimenting a work of art. I don’t understand - yes, I know Scott went inside the demon’s mind and grabbed you out, but if he grabbed you in pieces someone else patched you up! You must know this!”

“No, we don’t know this. And that’s because no one did. Patch him up.” Scott was keeping his cool but Noah could feel the tension rolling off his body. He was sure Scott’s eyes were not red just because the alpha had a huge amount of self control. He kept looking at Abraham, though, curious from the way he was phrasing the idea of a patched up soul. “Me and Lydia went inside the demon’s mind, we found him, I roared so he could see me and then when I came out, Stiles came out too.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’ve heard. But how did you contain the soul without a body? And how did you sew it up? Nogitsune’s are known for literally destroying their hosts by perverting their memories and unraveling their souls. Even if you were able to create a subconscious image of Stiles fighting it and roaring it into following you, you still grabbed pieces. Was it your emissary? Or any of you? You are not a kahuna, are you?” He asked Danny, who shook his head.

“No one did. I followed Scott out. He even gave me a new body - the nogitsune literally spat me out and I crawled out until I felt whole again.”

“Shut up.” Abraham was now looking at Scott like he was something… marvelous. Noah looked quizzically at the incubus, but he wouldn’t pay attention to anyone but the alpha. “Shut up! You actually patched him up! And gave him a new body! God damn it, Scotty boy - you are a piece of work!”

Noah could tell the whole pack was nervous about what Abraham had just said. “It was nothing,” Scott said, but Abraham just laughed and finished Noah’s milkshake.

“Er, guys?” Danny broke the eerie silence that had taken over, “why has the music stopped?”

They all turned towards the middle of the mall. All the teenagers in the audience were looking at the stage where a young girl had just finished singing, and now was looking directly at them. Something inside Noah tensed, because there was no way the girl could look at them without knowing where they were.

“Hey, everyone, why don’t you help me and kill those mongrels for me? Please?” The girl pointed her hand at them, and the collective gaggle moved their heads towards them.

“Should we run?” Stiles asked Scott.

“Run.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to write Abraham as an aromantic being, but I needed to make the remark that those who love him are driven mad because of his demonic nature, not because of his aromanticism - since that would be demonizing aro people. I also made the point that he can fight that portion of his nature - by being in platonic love with someone else, which he can be - and as a matter of fact, that's because he's been acting more and more human ever since he found out he doesn't have to kill in order to feed.


End file.
